So as you can tell we have 9 years gap so it just makes sense that he’s had more experience in life more than I do. I’ve been putting off this thought since we met because I didnt wanna ruin what i we have just because of some past that I shouldnt even be thinking about but now,after 3 yrs. And now that I am closer to him and we’re kinda talking about what I want if ever we get married and all that stuff, Im beginning to think about his sexual history again.
And I think. because of the fact that I cant change that anymore, I wanna have sex with others as well just so we’re kind of tie in terms of that and I dont feel like I’m missing out something. I opened up about it and he would say yes he’s fine but I dont think he totally is…I dont think I would want it too but it’s just that I wanna experience it so I dont feel bitter or insecure that he’s had more of something than I do… and i know if he’s really gonna be the one for me, I’ll be stuck with the same sex partner forever lol… which i dont really mind, i just cant get over the fact that he’s had more. And I’m the type of person that thinks sex is intimate, it’s not just sex to me, but for him, it is… it is just sex…
he even said last time that he thinks that people who cheat have better sex cos they get the variety of sex exp… i feel more insecure now because in the past he’s done that… what if he does it to me and our relationship… it’s like i wanna be like him just so I dont feel bad about myself being stick to one and taking sex too seriously :((
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I know that what really matters to him tho is what he does outside of bed, like other acts of service and the way he takes care of me and all that… i dont know maybe im trying to see what sets me apart from his past partners..it’s quite hard for me to tell but I know he treats me differently, his family told me that too :(( and I’m also only the 2nd girl that he’s ever introduced to his family as his partner.
Can someone help me organize my thoughts and what I feel? :((
3 comments
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You’re so immature and insecure. My god. You feel like you’re missing out on a bunch of sex and you need to “tie” the number of people he’s had sex with? And you want to be intimate with a bunch of other men who aren’t your partner just because? It seems like you’re just inexperienced and can’t recognize what you have right in front of you.
Enter, the end of the relationship. We’ve been waiting.