i’m (18F) at college and a virgin. i messed around with this guy and he asked me if he could fuck me (he knew i was a virgin) and i said no. afterwards when i was telling my friends about it they were like yeah, makes sense losing your virginity isn’t a hookup thing. and i didn’t really think that was my thought process… but sure. when i was talking to a different friend he was just like, why’d you say no? and i just… didn’t really have an answer. i don’t think i care about the concept of being/not being a virgin a lot. i think i’m mostly just insecure about myself (not the prettiest/skinniest). i just… how do i know it’s the right person? or time? is it an innate feeling? should i feel no insecurity? or is that normal? when will i know? or like.. does it just not matter at all?
3 comments
Different people think about virginity differently. Your friend who said why did you say no was male which can sometimes make a difference. At the end of the day it entirely boils down to you – your decision and how you feel about it.
And stop with the negative self talk – it’s not good for you! Give yourself more respect!
It’s very special to be the man and to have sexual intimacy if woman’s first time — try to retain excellent relationships for your entire life — thus would encourage you to consider the ability to care and to be cared for… it’s a big deal — don’t try to make it casual.
You’ll find the right time everyone does with that special someone, a lot of people do it with someone they trust and have a decent relationship/connection with, everyone has some form of insecurities when having sex, it’s always best to bid your time it’s completely normal you do it when you are ready just make sure to be safe the first few times when doing it.