Do you ever miss hanging out with your old buddies?

17 comments

1. Yes and a handful of them still hang out with each other. I’ve come to peace with the fact that we’ve drifted apart. It was definitely good times that I’ll vaguely remember forever.

   A rant/gibberish that typed out and decided to post instead of deleting:

   But then I also remember that I stopped hanging out with them because that kind of “clique” dynamic held them back socioeconomically. We didn’t have a fight or anything. I don’t think there’s beef at all but I definitely distanced myself because I needed to concentrate on myself for a few years. After all that time I reconnected with a few people from the group but nothing lasted. I see them doing events together because they post about it on social media. I used to feel bad for not being invited but I’ve come around to realizing that I wouldn’t enjoy hanging out with them because I’m simply too different nowadays. If I were still the old me from 6-8 years ago, I would fit in with them more and that’s just not where I want my life to be headed towards.

2. Yeah but at this point we are all completely different people from when we were in our teens and 20’s we just arent compatible and the whole dynamic is off as we changed, I think about them often and wonder if I ever cross their mind

3. I do miss it sometimes.

   it reminds me of a time in my life where’d my responsibilities were much less.

   life has taken us each in different paths though.

4. There were years where I grappled with the sad reality that some of my longer friendships fizzled out because people moved or we drifted apart because of where our lives took us. Relationships are all about relevance, and if the relevance isn’t there, it’s hard for some people to put energy into the small talk of catching up, etc…

5. Most of my chaps moved out of the city. I did so and really miss the good old days, in which we were hanging out together.

6. Yeah I miss it but it also feels like a different phase of life. I basically had 2 best friends: one lives very close but is also single and childfree while I’m married and have a kid. So we hang out once in awhile but don’t always have a lot to talk about (also we’re both pretty introverted).

   The other friend is kinda complicated. He’s gotten angry about the natural distance that happens as you age and people move. He’s always complained that we don’t stay in touch enough. Also likely has a drinking problem and you don’t know if you’ll get the drunk jerk version of him or the cool one. I actually recently declined to do an event that would’ve involved heavy drinking when he was in town and he hasn’t talked to me since, and honestly it’s crossed my mind that it wouldn’t bug me much if he never messaged me again. Which sounds horrible to write.

   Other friends I try to keep in touch as I can but the days feel gone where I’d just call someone up to chat for an hour. I have another friend I’ve known since high school and we still do a bunch of gaming online together, just coop campaign stuff.

7. unfortunately time has gone.

8. For all those saying their friendships have fizzled out, I hope that’s just because you’ve moved on and made new friends in the process…

9. I miss the old days with my old friends just about every day at some point. We had so much damn fun back then and life was so much more simple.

   I have also kept all my old friends. All the guys I was running around with at 16-18 are still my closest friends at 41.

10. I still remember the time I went out to eat with my best friend growing up (and through college).

    It was a double date with our partners and we just had nothing left to talk about. He had gone on to start a family and work in insurance and our lives had clearly changed paths.

    My other friends, we had a lot of good and bad times, still see them here or there. I’m 41 and still feel a bit lost in life.

11. I do. Which is why we’re hanging out for a whole weekend in two weeks! Stoked for it, even though it causes a universal eye roll amongst our wives. Most of us have been friends for 20+ years now.

12. I have a group of about 5 friends i still see from university and 1 friend from childhood that i see regularly. And by regularly i mean 2-3 times a year when our schedules align and we plan to hang out. Families and life gets in the way but it’s like old times when we do get together. Our group chat with memes helps us keep connected despite the distance.

13. I do a lot. I’ve had a lot of great friends I liked a lot that have drifted apart. Mostly due to marriage and eventually kids. I usually see them a few times per year rather than the several times per week when we were younger. I’m currently 30 and have had to find younger friends to get people that want to hang out regularly and have minimal responsibilities. I think it might get better once the young kids have grown enough to start coming around the garage and going on the snowmobiles. But it probably won’t be the wild alcohol fueled nights like the old days. Though, my dad brought me to a lot of those kinds of parties by the time I was 5 or so which gives me hope

14. Sure. I think it’s very normal to reminisce about bygone days when, looking back now, life was so much simpler and carefree. I still stay in touch with two guys I have been best friends with since we were in middle school. They are like brothers but we all have families, careers, and responsibilities that only allow us to hang out once or twice a year. The rest of the group of friends we hung out with in my 20’s / early 30’s went separate ways and that’s okay. I really don’t miss them much. I do miss those “wild and crazy” days sometimes with the larger group but am very thankful for the friendship and bond I have with my two closest friends. The three of us just decided we were not going to allow ourselves to drift apart. That’s friendship.

15. Here and there. We all moved or drifted apart after high school. I miss seeing a couple guys who I connect with as an adult, but the rest of them are just too different from me now. I mostly miss that stage of my life when my biggest priority was to have fun. But then again, I also really enjoy my 30s and the independence and calmness it brought (I don’t have kids yet, lol). I enjoy owning a home, having a wife, I enjoy my work. It’s a new chapter.

16. If they were like they were when we hung out, yes I miss it. But as life has gone on most everyone has changed just a bit that it isn’t like it used to be. I don’t really miss hanging out with most of them since things have changed so much for a few. One has gone to the extreme with their politics and it is their whole life. One has become wealthy and seriously thinks he rules over anyone since he was born on third and acts like he hit a triple. The handful I want to see are just too busy with their lives to do so. There are a handful of them that also show no empathy towards a guy when they are going through things, thinking just shitting on them is the answer. I’ve grown tired of that.

    I’ve found my brothers to be who I would rather hang with now.

17. I still keep in touch with a handful of them and we meet up a couple of times a year but it’s not the same. Tony Soprano had it right when he said “remember when” is the lowest form of conversation. Whenever me and the guys talk about our current lives or the overall world around us, it becomes apparent how much we’re different now, and it’s a buzzkill. So to hold it together, conversation drifts back to laughing about that fort we built in the woods that collapsed on that kid, what was his name? We can never remember.