To all the women out there – if you ever disliked another woman from the very get go (ideally first meeting situation) what made you dislike them and why? How quickly did you cement your opinion of them?

27 comments

  1. Met someone through a friend, within the first 30 minutes of meeting she was talking badly about someone else we both knew, I mean REALLY REALLY talking shit about them and for no real reason

    It put such a bad taste in my mouth I told the friend that introduced us not to invite me anywhere if she was going to be there.

  2. She was being unkind, rude, and disrespectful to someone she judged as beneath her. Took less than 30 seconds of hearing/seeing her to decide I never wanted to be associated with her

  3. Her literal first words to me were an insult. She was a friend’s new girlfriend who he’d just introduced to the group, and I had just smiled hello and said “hi, I’m X”, and her response was to smirk and ask if my eyelashes were real because they looked so bad. Not even a fucking hi, just straight to being mean. It was very obviously not a “oh she’s probably just socially awkward” situation, so I had made up my mind after that one comment. She kept being awful to me alone the rest of the night and made fun of me for everything from my profession to my outfit, so after that I just refused going to any more hangouts where she was invited.

  4. I had a coworker who, the very first time we met, told me a racist joke. Like that was how she introduced herself.

    It got worse from there.

    No thanks, pass.

  5. If they come across as pretentious or walk around with their chest puffed out, so to speak. Thinking they are above people whether it be presented in a subtle way or a blunt way. If you smile at them and they either don’t smile back or just give you that kind of ~weird~ smile. Like the “why are you smiling at me peasant” kind of smile. Generally being rude, whether it be to me or someone else. A good example would be meeting someone at a group dinner for the first time and noticing how they speak to the waiter. That sort of thing.

  7. I’ve had multiple people like that. Sometimes it was something blatant, like they were rude, other times it’s just the vibes. If usually try to stay open minded for several more meetings before I decide “yep, just really don’t like you”.

  9. I didn’t like that she kept disturbing me from listening to the lecture, with questions our professor had just discussed and she would know if she were listening😀 We’re friends now and she still does it, but I know how to deal with it better so it doesn’t interrupt with my learning as much

  10. I don’t like pushy people. Male or female. Better for me now that I’m older. Other women didn’t seem to like me right off the bat when I was younger. And it hurt. I didn’t understand it. I had friends. Usually one or a small group when I was a kid. I was out playing baseball, basketball. I enjoyed doing guy stuff more. I did play with dolls. I always have heard that 2 women can’t ever be good friends until they find something wrong with each other. I think that’s kind of sad too. Because we have a lot in common.

  11. My uncle got a new girlfriend who I saw right through from the first meeting. I tried warning my mother but she didn’t believe me. Everyone saw her as such a nice woman. Three years later her true colors came through and she blew our family apart to a point where no one is talking to each other anymore. She’s moved on to new victims. Even hit the news paper once when she made up a fake story about a man stealing money so she could take over his bingo game each week. He, of course, was cleared and started bingo somewhere else. Everyone followed him and my uncle’s ex had to close that bingo game down since no one attended.

    I don’t know how I knew. I’ve just always been able to see through most bad people right away. A gut feeling, I guess.

  12. It’s that fine line between confidence and arrogance for me, and when people are just overly nice to where it comes off condescending.

  13. One of my boyfriends lady friends. She kissed him on the forehead the first time I met her. It has since been established that she’s just a weird hippie and he’s not always the best with boundaries, but I haven’t been able to get over that initial dislike so far.

  14. There was this girl in high school I didn’t really like. She was too peppy and too nice, and somehow it rubbed me the wrong way, but I ignored it to try and be her friend. But I quickly gave up because she just was not my type of person.

    Later on, she turned out to be incredibly annoying in the sense that she would compare her anxiety with others and talk about her many alleged suicide attempts and self-harm in a “I’m so quirky” kind of way. She was also lowkey pretty emotionally manipulative, as I found out from a couple of her ex-partners and ex-friends during my high school years.

    She also ended up sort of being a copycat of me, which I am happy to admit is a petty reason to dislike her. But considering the context, I honestly don’t really care that I was a bit petty lol. I’m not one to gatekeep styles unless I think the person is annoying as fuck.

  15. My good friends Baby Momma, later wife. She hated me and we had never met in person. As adults do, he and I reconnected during grad school after a random run in downtown. They were engaged and I was married. She gave me the weakest hand shake and hello.

    I was right about her, she’s on her 4th BD and my friend died unfortunately. She’s tried to become friends since and I very much so ghost her in all ways. She did some many unnecessary mean things to me before I am scared of her. Has a bad temper and coke habit.

  17. I’m currently working a contract job and on my first day this woman who works for a different department but who works in the same office hub came back from lunch. She saw me and said I’m not going to introduced myself. I had my back to her but she could tell that I’m unattractive. The office have hot seats. A few weeks in and I ended up sitting at the desk opposite hers but there’s a partition. One time she came back to her desk, saw me and said I can’t believe I have to sit opposite her. She purposely looked at me one time and said so ugly and do something about it and sat down and slammed her pen. She complains a lot and lacks compassion. One time she was finalizing the registration of a trainee for an event. The main manager was sitting next to her and he started mentioning how there’s something wrong with the trainee’s eyes. At first I thought he meant he had a wandering eye, but later on he said that his eyes seems to have gotten worse so he has some eye condition. That woman got pissed about it! I think she would have to meet him. She said oh great frustratedly and thanks for telling me in an angry manner. How unsympathetic and arrogant do you have to be to react in such a manner over someone with an eye condition! It made me more angry because I have had multiple eyelids surgeries which messed up my eyes.

  18. Coworker. In the first ten minutes I knows I didn’t like her and she couldn’t be trusted. She came in never having done this job acting like she knew everything. She was the newest person and she kept trying to boss everyone around. And a few hours there I would tell she was big into gossip, like
    Not doing her work because she needed to know the scoop on everyone. As the day went on she told two stories from her marriage. And yeah. I knew from there she was not a good person. And I was right. She created problems in every single classroom she worked in. People hated working with her and she would make up stories about them. She ended up sleeping with the husbands of atleast two coworkers, one who was pregnant and she was the one planning the baby shower and was finally fired when a mom came with proof she was sleeping with her husband. There was also a rumor she was sleeping with a few other dads. After she got fired I guess she was still lying to her husband who a few weeks later had an emergency and came in looking for her and he was told she didn’t work there anymore. There was other drama that happened with her but yeah I was right she was not a good person.

  19. When they immediately start to gossip about someone also present or known by the group.

  20. There was this one woman I worked with that everyone loved, and we both had the same work friends outside of work that we would hang out with etc. From the very start, before either of us really started being friends with these other people, I just… idk. I got a vibe. I’d be nice but always sort of kept it short with her.

    When we started hanging out with these mutual friends, all of my friends were like oh she’s so nice and kind and sweet and she doesn’t have a mean bone in her body type thing, but I wasn’t fooled. She would make these sort of… backhanded compliments. Like I was the oldest in the friend group by a couple of years and I remember her saying something like oh you look so nice! I don’t think I’d be brave enough to wear that if I was your age and everyone for some reason thought this was a compliment? I was like yeah thanks but thought it was fucking rude of her to say that.

    I was best friends with one of these girls for a time and we went to a birthday lunch for one of our friends, and I was talking to my bff about why I don’t like this girl and why. At that lunch she actually started noticing exactly what she was saying and how she’d say it and realised she was a mean girl who only did nice things for others for the kudos and not bc she was just that person

  21. Girls who don’t acknowledge girls at parties but are keen to interact w men

  23. This is a flaw in me, not the other person. I loathe baby talk from adults to other adults – the cutesy ‘oh I’m so silly, adults need to care for me, eeeee, my toys are alive and you have to placate me or I cry’ in a very high pitched tone thing.

    There’s another woman in my social circle who does this constantly and it’s a pickaxe through my sanity. I loathe her voice, and I feel like shaking her until her teeth rattle. She’s perfectly nice in other respects, and doesn’t deserve my rage, but the twee voice and giggling and helpless weeping mean I avoid her so I don’t act like an asshole.

    Though I HAVE run into dudes who do this and I want to smite them too.

  24. This happens very often. Lots of women are passive aggressive and surround themselves with drama which I have no tolerance for.

  25. I’ve met two women like this… Both extremely loud and wanting to be the center of attention. Touching literally every man in a flirty manner IN FRONT OF THEIR SOs because they were “one of the guys.” But truthfully, every woman saw right through their insecurity and need to overcompensate with lack of clothes and loudness. Then, they often proceeded to pick on the gfs/wives to show that, again, they joked like the guys and the women just didn’t “get” them.

    The first woman pretty much ruined my marriage. She was awful. The second, I was luckily a lot more secure with myself/my new relationship/my SO, and I just knew her type at that point and the best way to react is not to…

  26. I usually would meet women like this that were friends of friends or just out and you could tell the woman was into herself, flirted a whole lot and needed male attention (like a kid needing attention but worse). I knew I didn’t like these women from the get go.

  27. Unfortunately I’ve noticed this when I’m intimidated/envious and am trying to work on those feelings. Honestly that’s really been the only thing that’s immediate. Other challenges I have like someone who interrupts/dismisses in conversation are more of a slow build.

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