I met my boyfriend as a hookup, we were never the perfect two puzzle piece, but we were a very loving couple. I cheated on my boyfriend (just kissing no sex) two weeks ago and he found out when we met recently. As someone who comes from a household that often push the dirt under the carpet and lack communications, I didn’t tell him though that it was just had a handjob really, but I couldn’t bring myself to. I lied that my hickey was a pinch, he knew that I was lying and spilled everything he wanted to say. He told me that he is tired o the anxiety/insecurity he has in the relationship, and how i gave him nightmares from the insecurity.
I truly am very sorry for what I did and it is true that I wasn’t serious at first, because meeting a stranger was definitely sus. But I’m still young and want to explore while I can, but I lost my self control. I know I did wrong, I know I have no excuse for that, but when I was with him I couldn’t bring myself to say sorry and say what I did, with my habit to hide the dirt under the rug. On that same day, we agreed to keep each other open, if he meet someone, I can. He did tell me that we are mutual now, but it has never been the same, well not that I expected him to ever be same.
I’m so sorry Zach I truly am. I knew from the start we wouldn’t be forever, but I’m sorry that I’ve hurt you in this relationship. How can I amend things together, for that we can last till we officially break off mutually.
(Zach is not his real name, don’t worry)
TLDR : I cheated on my Bf and feel awful, I didn’t admit what I did, but he found out. We are mutual but how I can I patch things up?
4 comments
> (just kissing no sex)
> just had a handjob really
Girl, you’re trickle-truthing us and yourself just as much as you did your boyfriend. You need to own up to what you did, which was a heck of a lot more than “just kissing.”
If you already know this relationship isn’t forever, why are you dragging your boyfriend through staying together when you’ve already hurt him? Let him go. Do some work on yourself about why you felt this was okay to do and why you kept lying (even to strangers on Reddit).
If you want to explore then break up and go explore, and don’t seriously date anyone.
Don’t just stay in the relationship because you feel bad. You literally say you just want to last until you inevitably break up. Why bother then? And it sounds like you’re still lying to him about the extent of what happened. And the open thing is crazy at this point. It solves nothing. It sounds like you feel bad that you got caught, not that you did it. You regret it because he’s upset now, not because you betrayed him.
To me that says you were never serious about this in the first place. Break up and let him be with someone who wants to be in a committed relationship with him, and go live the life you want.
We can’t answer that because we’re not your boyfriend.
i don’t understand the point of a relationship if you’ve already convinced yourself it has no future. if you want to explore, go explore. when you’re ready to commit, commit. otherwise your relationship is just a one-way street