Hello guys,
I’m 32 years old, and I suffer from general anxiety and OCD.
I’m telling you this because I feel like due time, I’m losting a lot of friends, even if I try to talk with them naturally. This worries me a lot because I try to be polite, friendly, with every one of them.
But my daily-day life is with a lot of problems. Unemployed, with some physicall problems now like asthma, epilepsy, and mental health, and I’m feeling overwhelming. I feel overwhelming since months ago, and normally I need time alone to recover, playing games, watching a series, and so on.
So basically, since years ago that I’m in this state of recovering the burnout alone. I don’t think my burnot is from this year, but from other problems years ago. This got worse this year.
So this week I was thinking everyone is gowing away. They know my problems, some really care and don’t care if I don’t talk too much, other ones I feel more cold to me.
Let me tell you an example recently: I have one friend that put me on a discord with some friends of her. She was very happy that I was talking to them. They even start to help me finding a job and I was so grateful. But from night to day, they stop replying my messages, or stopped completly to talk to me one the group on discord. It’s like I was not there. So my coping mechanism was imediatly not talking with them. Since some groups of discord were like this way even if I talked, I stopped going there.
I start to ask myself: Am I the red flag? Because yeah I love laughing, yes I love talking about games, in an no agressive way, like every single one is important, I love talking about books and series, jobs, life, etc.
This is draining me out, because 5 years ago, or 6, I was a social butterfly. And now I’m the opposite. I’m happy being who I am, and I know things change with time. But I’m tired to feel this way. Like I’m always the problem with the friendships, and not them.
1 comment
Pursue your passions and don’t focus on others liking you. Just be kind to others without expecting reciprocation, and eventually you will find your tribe. People have all sorts of reasons or triggers as why they decide to stop talking to someone. But that’s their business. Especially true for online interactions because it’s already on a shaky foundation. There are so many cultures of interaction. Some appreciate a person who will make effort to interact with them and some think of
It as try hard, etc. people are raised differently, have different experiences, have people who treated them well in the past, or mistreated them, you never know. It’s none of your problem. Just work on yourself. Work on being kind, sociable, but pursue what you value in life without waiting for acceptance. Don’t know if that made sense, but my two cents