We got married on beginner of this year. We move to another state. We dated almost 5 years before got married. Things started being a little odd for me when my husband start not being interested on having sex anymore. At the beginner of September we move to a new apartment with 2 bedrooms. We have different schedules … so he started sleeping in another room. One morning he asked me to get his computer/tablet in the room and he left he’s WhatsApp open ( he never used this app before). I couldn’t believe… she is a woman that he meet on only fans and he weekly sending money to her … and she sent to him videos and nude pictures. I was furious and couldn’t hold one minute and I confronted him. He said it is just to me masturbate. For me is cheating. He spent more than a thousand dollar already sending money to her. We are going to start couple counseling but I am so disappointed and disgusted of I read and saw it. There’s a detail: she is asking him to stop have any kind of intimacy with me because she doesn’t like it. She likes him. I found her profile on Reddit and I texted her as I was a client … and guess what happened ? She offered me pictures of her piss***, feet, nudes…if I pay her $100 weekly hahahah she is a slu*** and my husband thinks she has feelings for him. She just want his money. I have her phone number should I call her? I am about to loose my mind.
Update: I called her but I hung up before she answered. I know it was a mistake. I am just so hurt that I can’t think straight. There’s other fact too. I am not an American citizen yet … I am a GC holder. My husband told me that if I call her and called her slut or whore … I will be committed a felony and I will be in jail or deported. I think he wants to scare me. Things got really ugly tonight. I wish I can call someone to talk about it but I am so ashamed of my situation. Almost 5 years dating. I could come back to my home country after university but I chose to get married to him because I love him. My life is a nightmare. I can believe all the headache to get everything ready for our wedding, family come from another country … for this nightmare. I thought we will have a family. I am so angry. He is a POS.
25 comments
i think you need a new husband
Why on earth would you call *her* when you could be calling a divorce lawyer? She’s just running a business; your husband is the one cheating on you with someone who doesn’t even want him.
I’m not usually one to jump straight to “divorce him” but in this case…. You need to leave that man.
I think that you need to remove 50% of all joint money plus an extra $1000 and put this money into an account in your name only. Then, totally separate your finances, lock down your credit, and speak to several divorce attorneys. Pick and start the divorce process. Ask about a post nup with an infidelity clause. Also ask him to have a full std screening done.
Then sit your husband down and tell him that curs all contact with this woman and blocks her on everything, agrees to therapy, open phone and electronics policy, and signs the post nup. Or he can pack a bag and get out, and you will have him served with divorce papers.
He is cheating on you, and you deserve better.
Updateme!
I am so lost. I even don’t know if I should try get screenshots of their disgusting conversation and take to a lawyer. I just want that his whole family know what kind of husband he is for me. I changed my life for him and guess what I got back ? A fuc*** cheater.
Why are you putting up with this?
Leave his ass! He’s an idiot and betrayed you.
Leave this loser.
A reply to my comment brought me back to this post and I am still angry for you. You deserve better. Better friends and a better husband. I hate that you are making excuses for him, your friends and your sexual abuser.
I’d be embarrassed to be married to someone like this.
Onlyfans should always be considered cheating bc of the personal and direct contact you have with the content creator.
My ex BIL was unemployed and my SIL was busting her rear supporting him. He was unemployed for over 2 years acting all picky about jobs like he was a princess. He got into some nasty stuff and he was burning her money. Finally they divorced.
Make copies of the financial records of him paying for this trash. He’s probably sexting her too. Gather evidence girl. Separate your finances or start moving stuff over to an account he has no access to.
Get out of your emotional thinking and start planning and being logical. Divorce is just a business transaction. Splitting assets and such. Prepare.
Why are you mad at her? She is not in a relationship with you. The only deviant here is your loser husband.
Def dump him. You deserve better.
Your husband is the one who made a commitment to you, not her. I think it’s immoral and wrong of her to do whatever shes doing with a married man, but at the end of the day, she has no commitment to you, even though i think this makes her a gross human being. Hes the one who promised to be loyal. Porn is one thing, direct contact is another. Hes an idiot for thinking that she actually has any feelings for him, considering the fact that she’s an only fans model, but I would feel the same way if she were a coworker or anything. Your beef is with him.
Do the following immediately:
1) put a stop on all your cards and remove him from your accounts.
2) screenshot everything and print them out (then mail them to yourself with certified mail)…don’t open the letter.
3) tell someone else you trust what is going on and prepare a “go bag” from your house.
4) Open a new bank account and put your money there…preferably at a new bank.
5) call a divorce attorney
Whoa, whoa, whoa, stop the clock, she’s the slut? Bruh, you are angry but let’s direct it where it belongs, your husband, not someone making a living selling spicy material. If you go to a car dealer, they are going to try to sell you a car no different. She’s doing her job.
However, you’ve got more going on then just some only fans. No sex or limited sex, desperate bedrooms… come on, be smarter. Good luck in therapy. I hope your spouse is honest.
Contact her and contact a lawyer to see how divorce looks for you.
If you stay make him sign a postnuptial agreement with an infidelity clause and access to all his finances and devices.
Also if you stay you should download the APP called “covenant eyes” it helps monitor people with S3x addiction or P*rn Addiction.
IMO he cheated emotionally and financially, so you should cut him off from everything and lock any and all accounts since he’s unemployed and contributing nothing.
Tell him he needs to find a job and stop wasting money he doesn’t have on women who don’t care about him IRL.
It’s never good when they think the stripper or SW cares about them….
She’s not the issue. Your husband is. As soon as she’s gone he just finds another. And usually they are more risqué
Just tell him you’re thinking of making an only fans for the attention and the income. This will start a tumultuous conversation.
It’s your husband’s fault not hers. He’s a shit head
Looking like evidence for the judge. If he can support her, he sure as hell can support you.
Update: I called her but I hung up before she answered. I know it was a mistake. I am just so hurt that I can’t think straight. There’s other fact too. I am not an American citizen yet … I am a GC holder. My husband told me that if I call her and called her slut or whore … I will be committed a felony and I will be in jail or deported. I think he wants to scare me. Things got really ugly tonight. I wish I can call someone to talk about it but I am so ashamed of my situation. Almost 5 years dating. I could come back to my home country after university but I chose to get married to him because I love him. My life is a nightmare. I can believe all the headache to get everything ready for our wedding, family come from another country … for this nightmare. I thought we will have a family. I am so angry. He is a POS.
Maybe it’s time just to ask him who do you want me or her. At the counseling session. How can you tell a married couple not to be intimate with each other? And he listen to her do not call her again block her number block her on Reddit and all platforms.
What you allow is what will continue.