To give context, I’ve met this girl about 3 years ago now, and ever since I met her we clicked, we had similar interests, hobbies, music taste, sense of humor and just generally loved each others company since we started talking.
Over the course of these 3 years we’ve slowly became best friends and I would say we’ve been really close for about a year now, we talk every day, message each other regularly see each other talk about what we think about people around us and so on. Now, the problem is, I have never showed her directly I have any kind of feelings for her romantically, ever. But on a few occasions it happened that I showed a bit of jealousy when she talked to other guys, but it was more some stupid passive aggressive coming from my side (which I know is childish and stupid) so she could take maybe those things as hints that I do have some feelings, but I guess jealousy can come from a friend as well so I have no idea what she thinks. Anyway, she is a really weird person, she isnt touchy with anyone and is really shy and weird when it comes to any kind of “Love” type situations. She just overall really weird when it comes to those things. Over the course of out 3 years friendship she had crushes on 3 people I know, and with all 3 it was really weird and nothing happened. She told me about those crushes but only because i asked her whats going on, we talked about it a bit and thats it. I’ve always just given her friendly advice even tho I was completely in love with her. Over these 3 years she did some things that could be taken as hints but not much in last few months. And she did say a couple of times that she doesnt like when people straight up and confess her feelings.
But its so different and weird between us, I dont know what to do. I just feel like we are made for eachother but she is so weird and i cant read her, i just have no idea what does she feel and did she ever feel anything romantically for me. I am to scared to tell her that, because i dont want to lose her as a friend and person that i talk to daily, even if i dont lose her our relationship will change probably if the answer is no.
Three years is such a long period and i think ive been hiding these feelings for so long that they are affecting me negatively to the point where i just think about her for the majority of my day. My feeling are growing even more day by day and its killing me, im getting jealous over stupid thing and i keep them all in myself and im just filled with negative emotions if i dont get some special treatment or something stupid. I know its weird and childish but ive just kept these feelings for so long that i have no idea what to do now, I dont want to lose her, but yet i feel like if i dont tell her im just gonna regret it in the future, and i already feel horrible as it is now.
So i am wondering, how would you girls react if your best friend of three years confessed you his feelings, what would men do in my position, I have some many questions i just feel lost and scared. She is a perfect girl in my eyes, i know all her flaws and I love every part of her , when i look at her i see a woman that is fit to be a mother to my children, and to me that is something ive never seen in any woman i have ever met, to me that is a reason to fight for that woman. I need a solution, its too hard for me to realize what to do at this point.
How can i confess my love to her? And would you do it in my situation?
TLDR: My(22M) best friend(21F) of three years is a girl that is really weird when it comes to intimate romantical situations and i just can read her. I have no idea how she feels about me and I am too afraid to find a way how to confess my feelings for her after such long time.