I am a young person, and i have recently made some pretty poor choices in my life, and I will probably have to fork out 35k~ in lawsuits and other stupid stuff to get me out of a situation.
I wanted to marry my girlfriend and start a family next year, but I will probably not be able to do that, and I am now scared, since all our fucking savings are going down the drain, and we will have to start over from 0 now. Fuck me. I have been having constant panic attacks for months, lost 10 pounds of weight, and have been feeling pretty suicidal, since I will not be able to start a family because stupid me decided to fuck us over entirely for life.
I just wanted to know if anyone has ever been deep in financial burden, but overcame afterwards and could start a family or at least be happy afterwards.
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My father made some bad financial moves before I was born, and used them as a catalyst to completely revise how he viewed spending. He buckled down and worked hard (often at multiple jobs, day and night) to get out of the hole he’d dug.
Free of that initial burden, he later used that work ethic to pay off a 20-year mortgage in ten years to get out from under the bank, and kept up his efforts to build a comfortable life for himself as he approached retirement age. He was never “rich,” but he reached a point of being able to provide for himself without worry and look out for us and others when we needed it.
You fucked up. It happens. You don’t have to let it ruin your life, but you should use it to change your way of thinking.
Sorry to hear you’re going through that.
If you’re “starting over at 0” and not in serious debt, you’re actually in much better shape than the majority of people 20-24. And even if you’re the full 35K in debt, that puts you around where the average 20-something with college debt is. I promise you, people crawl out of worse holes all the time.
Personally, I never had enough money to even have a huge debt; around your age, I lost my job in the middle of a recession and had nothing to live on, no savings, and couldn’t get hired – the unemployment rate was almost 25% in my city! It was so bad I was intentionally overdrafting my bank account in order to buy groceries (really stupid in hindsight), and begging every person I knew to help pay my rent. Eventually I got evicted. It was dark.
Took me years to get to a good place but I eventually found work through a temp agency that turned into a good enough job to pay my bills and even buy a house. It wasn’t a high paying job, and it wasn’t a fancy house, but it was an unbelievable turn around to me that I never would have thought possible when I was in that dark place. In five years I went from my lowest point of having absolutely nothing with a bank account in the red, to being a homeowner. And yes, I was happy again.
It’s very possible. Good luck.
We were almost homeless as a kid. My parents made some really bad financial moves and had some businesses go bankrupt. They recovered nicely and are well situated now and all their children are pretty successful.
> I will probably have to fork out 35k~ in lawsuits and other stupid stuff to get me out of a situation.
Do you *know* that for sure?
What happened?