Why is Dating So Hard?

7 comments

1. Don’t give up. You will find the right person who will say yes

2. Because you use dating apps.

   On such apps, you’re nothing more than a product on Amazon. You can only guesstimate how enticing the product is even though you’ve never interacted or even seen it for real.
   It’s always better to walk into a store, see, touch and use the product before judging of its quality.
   The only way Amazon fixed this issue is by heavily subsidizing product testing: free returns and full refunds without any justification.

   You can’t really do that in real life, because human beings are not products.

   Meet people on real life, you will be more than a few pictures, a short bio and shitty pickup lines. You’ll have a presence, a voice, a smile, a stare, charisma, etc… These things can’t be perceived in pictures or on a screen, they have to be felt and experienced.

   So, my recommendation to you is to stop using dating apps and start meeting people in real life. Get to know them a bit before dating them, become acquainted with them before asking them out.

3. Get better at the dating app game. It’s different than real life.

4. Because you’re trying too hard. Make friends first.

5. They don’t do it and keep their self esteem up. People just give up and become hermits. The apps are just a cycle of self abuse. If you choose to use apps don’t expect anything. Don’t expect a date, a relationship, a connection, expect absolutely nothing. Only use it if you feel like using it, like on a lunch break or when you’re on the toilet. Because apps are pointless. Apps aren’t real life to most people on them. Be pleasantly surprised if anything positive comes from them and you will never be disappointed.

6. It’s because your not the prize or at least you don’t present yourself on dating apps as the prize.

   Don’t listen to these “one day you will find the right person” people who just want to placate you with nice platitudes to make you feel good.

   How to be the prize or someone that women notice and don’t flake on….well it’s easier than you may think.

   -Work out build muscle
   -Read tons of charisma and leadership material and apply that in real life
   -Ensure you dress cool and have style
   -Focus on achieving in your career and personal life
   -Figure out if you look better clean shaven or with a beard.
   -People skills, people skills, people skills
   -Strong social circle and being socially dominant and respected in your group
   -High positive energy (every guy including myself who is highly successful in relationships and who women gravitate to are high energy and positive.)

   Dating apps are like an auction , unless the packaging is prestine and worth looking at, you wont have people spending time on you.

   Believe you me, I turned myself from the 90 pound nerdy yet athletic weakling in early high school who women didn’t even look at into a man who has had so many tremendously good experiences with women and who ended up picking up women everywhere through casual conversation. So I know what I’m talking about.

   Honestly kid it’s like anything in life, if you want to be great at something you need to put in the time to get good at it. Everyone starts from a different point but the more effort you put into something the better.

   Most people don’t want to put in the effort and are ok complaining about whatever they don’t have. The line of people wanting success is long but the line of people willing to put in the work to be successful is very short at best.

7. I’m assuming you’re male. I’ve had great success on dating apps, try this little tweak to your approach. I have zero conversation on the app:

   First question: ” hey so and so, it’s nice to “meet” you. Are you actually located in new York? (Insert your city)

   Her: yes, I live in Queens

   Me: great! Let’s get to know each other in person . I have Wednesday or Friday night available this week. Which works for you? ( Always limit your availability)

   (If she has little or no interest she will go silent on you. If she has interest, she will make a day work. Do not alter your schedule for her. Make her work for you)

   Her: “I’m available Friday night after 5”

   Me: “sounds good. Meet me at xzy place at 6:00”. ( You must make plans, reservations, etc. Do not ask her what she likes to eat, do not ask any of her preferences. Be a man and take charge. You already know what she likes. She likes to dress up, look good, and feel special)

   After setting the date do not contact her again, go completely silent. Some time on Friday she will likely confirm plans. Show up on time. Greet her with a smile and a hug and tell her how amazing she looks.

   I like to tier my dates to give myself an escape. For example, last week I picked the girl up at 5. I drove her to a beautiful spot on the end of a lake to watch the sunset. After the sunset, I took her to play mini golf, and after mini golf a fairly expensive dinner. If I wasn’t feeling a connection I could have ended it after the sunset or after the mini golf.