People who “ruin” other people, why do you do it?

29 comments

1. Sounds like a teenager thing, what’s that

2. Because they’re rotten inside.

3. I don’t think people who do this would have the self awareness of empathy to understand why and why it’s a bad thing so.. not much point asking.

4. Because they have ego issues probably leaning towards the less than side.

5. You should add “try to” to this title…

6. My perspective is the folks who engage in dysfunctional communication are looking for attention. They are not invested in being in a healthy relationship with themselves or others, lack of accountability is prevalent in my experience.

7. Who does this kind of thing?

8. I’ve found it’s a mixed bag. Some have pure sadism and anger s the impetus; others are looking to fill a void and become punitive if not given exactly what they’re looking for. My mom is the former…I’ve had many experiences with the latter as well

9. Some people just suck and they always will.

10. What are you talking about, ruin? Do you mean hit a quit, or do you mean date and steal off their money and ruin their lives. It sounds like a kid is asking something that totally makes sense in their head.

11. Sounds like you are describing a “serpent,” better known as psychopath, sociopath, and toxic narcissist. They do it because they enjoy it. They don’t know how to stop, because like vampires (allegory) they feed of the living.

12. You know what’s ironic? They come to you damaged, you heal them and then they leave you damaged

13. Just ended with a gas lighting, uncommunicative, empathy lacking, narcissistic, bipolar one (this one’s not not diagnosed, but I was with a love worthy bipolar for years)…

    Here’s a little more…

    Her trip by me: took 4 days of her visit by me to bond (little weird but fun)

    two months of talk/text slowly going down hill

    My trip to her: it only took 4 out of 8 days of visiting her
    -total dumpster fire where she realized I wanted a team player, not to be controlled or used (nor would I let her))

    She’s a pretty blond… My type, but I’m aware enough to know to bail… She’s broken and I’m willing to provide a space to grow and heal, but I’m getting out. She didn’t ruin me but definitely would use me further if I allowed it.

14. Imagine getting stabbed in the back by someone you gave your deepest desires and love to. The memories of utter love and happiness between you two, only to see even your unfathomable dreams start to come true just to have them stripped from you later

15. I only strike those who have made the first assault then it is shoot till someone can no longer stand . If one didn’t do dirty shit then they would not have to worry about it but worse and actions cause the front friction

16. I realize you are probably hurt and dont want to discuss, but we need context on what you mean by “ruin”

17. People who do that, do it because of how they feel about themselves. My friend just got out of an extremely toxic relationship, the guy was manipulative and a narcissistic POS. The reason for this is because he believes so poorly of himself, but it’s also the environment he grew up in, he never knew how to be better because his family is the same way. Most of the time, it’s because it makes them feel better, but also because it validates their true beliefs about themselves.

18. Good luck getting people to own up to that.

19. Immaturity and insecurity

20. What do you mean ruin? How do you ruin someone?

21. Because I had someone emotionally ruin me now I can’t trust others yet crave sex and romance

22. Not my thing to do this to others, my guess is because they’re assholes, or just like to control others?

23. So i’ll bite. Society considers me a very attractive woman & i live in a luxurious city. It’s easy for me to find partners. When i was younger i believed i was a romantic, i wanted monogamous marriage. But my generation isn’t even really all that into that style of life anymore. I had so many men who would discover i wanted these things, so they would deceive me & play my emotions making me believe we had a future together. I would give myself fully to them believing i was in love & then eventually i realize it was all a trick just to make me want them for awhile until they’re done with me. And i mean long term as in years of a relationship together so to my young self that felt serious.

    This made me realize this is just who men are. The only loyal men i know of are men who lack options to ever be disloyal. Every guy who has access to & can get away with running through women, will. Men will say absolutely anything to a woman & not give a single damn how much it can destroy her when she realizes it’s all lies.

    I don’t see myself as someone who intentionally ruins men, but i am just not caring of what happens to them emotionally. I’m not sadistic to it, rather entirely indifferent. I view it as men are going to destroy women & they won’t give a single care in the world so why should i care what men deal with emotionally.

24. There is no real answer to this. When you confront those people they don’t even speak up than continue throwing insults and shades at others. Even when arrested they don’t even tell the real reason than come up with something else…

25. Elaborate what is your “ruin”

    Also people who don’t elaborate and post something expecting everyone to understand why do you do it ?

    Is it because you can?Does it make you feel mysterious? Is it because you feel a greater divine power above the average peasant human ? Why do you do it

26. What kind of stupid ass juvenile question is that? What do you expect the answer would be? “Nothing, just felt like doing it”.

27. 1. Gives them feeling that they are better than others
    2. They would rather inflict than be inflicted on
    3. Other reasons but these are the reasons based off 2 people I know

28. Because revenge feels much greater than forgiveness

29. What do you mean by ruining? How are they running people?