I made a previous post saying I didn’t want constant sex and many people commented saying I should let my partner cheat on me then and that no healthy man would be okay with having sex so little. I have a lower sex drive so one or two times a week is okay for me. I’m a woman btw so just wondering if this is realistic or should I just stay single forever.
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Every relationship is different so that totally depends on the people in it. I seen your other post and you have a lower sex drive, which isn’t a bad thing, it’s just how you work. You should be very upfront when meeting people you’re gonna be romantic with and tell them you are not into sex that much. Hopefully you’ll find someone with a low libido.
Yes once or twice a week is reasonable for a relationship. Most men should be okay with that.
Yeah that sounds fine in a relationship that’s better than once or twice a month/year. Honestly that doesn’t sound really crazy low
How often do you see your partner. Cause if you live together or your seeing each other most days of the week I can see how a lot of guys would have an issue with that.
I’d say once a couple has been together a while, anywhere from 2-5 times a week.
Early on it is pretty common to do it every single day. Every time the two see each other.
It’s different for everyone.
Find a man that loves you for you, a guy that will go out of his way for you and willing to compromise. If that guy loves you for you then in turn eventually he’ll come around to agreeing it may take quite a few talks. But he won’t give up if he truly loves you and cares don’t give up on him either unless they pressure you aggressively or get aggressive and have that talk of how much you want and he wants.
There definitely are guys who would be OK with less sex, or no sex. Be very clear and upfront about that, when you meet someone.
Having great sex doesn’t mean having lots of sex; it’s about quality as much as quantity. Me and my bf are both HL but can only see each other 1-2 times a week – we make sure we leave each other satisfied.
Are you comfortable initiating at least 50%? Open to trying new things? Participate enthusiastically and let him know how much you enjoy him? Or do you just lay there waiting for it to be over?
Unless she’s on her period. I’m getting it at least once a day on average.
I just checked your previous post. You didn’t include any numbers and I saw zero people recommending that you let a partner cheat although I’ve only scrolled halfway down so far.
Once or twice a week is pretty close to the average in a long term relationship.
Depends solely on the man. Some are hypersexual, asexual, everything between.
I believe in your other post you mentioned being in your 20s.
It’s unlikely you’re going to find a guy in his 20s (his sexual prime) content with 1-2 times a week.
You might try mixing things up now and then such as offering BJs or Hjs instead of intercourse.
In addition, most new relationships start off with having lots of sex during the *infatuation phase* even if someone does have a low libido.
“… should I just stay single forever.”
There are alternatives such as cultivating a FWB with a current platonic friend or dating older guys past their sexual prime. Lastly you can wait until you’re older if you prefer men your age.
Generally speaking, older people tend to have less sex than when they were in their 20s and people in long-term relationships and marriages also tend to have less sex than in the beginning.
Best wishes!
“requires” is maybe the wrong word but after 2 days I get a bit het up and after day 3 it becomes all consuming unless I self help
It’s different for everyone, and why it’s very important to figure out sexual compatibility BEFORE marriage. A mismatch in drive is a recipe for divorce.
2 times a week to keep things healthy
Find a guy with a lower sex drive like you.
1-3 times a week is healthy, honestly.
Keep in mind when you see them that shouldn’t be the focus but something to plan on at some point. I would make sure to explain your ideas on sex early on and try to compromise. Maybe if not sex you could have some foreplay.
Men are not a monolith, god I’m tired of making this point.
For some men once a week is great. For some, that’s intolerable.
Find someone who matches your drive or is reasonable about it.
Most healthy men will want to have sex with their partner a few times a week…if that’s not you, you have a hurdle, but it’s not a barrier. Find someone who has the same drive as you, FFS.
Find a guy that’s not into sex (maybe even an older guy?). Will take time, but will obviously solve the issue. With my previous partner it was almost everyday and that’s more in line with what I’m looking for.
> and many people commented saying I should let my partner cheat on me then
…are you sure? I went and checked that [post](https://reddit.com/r/dating_advice/s/KvoXB9imvD) and *by far and away* most of the comments, including the “Top Comments” are supportive and giving you suggestions on where to find men you might be compatible with. **In fact, I don’t think I saw a single comment say to just let them cheat on you**. And even if there was one or two of those, why would you focus on that one idiot instead of the countless other supportive people trying to help?
> What’s the acceptable amount of sex a man requires in a relationship?
This is impossible to answer because everyone is different. Contrary to what you (and many others may believe), many men are not sex crazed beasts who want to do nothing but have sex. And “requires” is an odd word. **Men are not a monolith**
The appropriate amount of sex is something that is compatible and healthily negotiated or agreed upon by you and your partner. If you’re struggling to find men who this applies to, I encourage you to go look at the Top Comments from your post from 14hrs ago. Many comments there were useful, such as tempering where you’re meeting men (avoiding places like bars/clubs and focusing on places built more around hobbies), adding in your OLD bio that you have less interest in sex, saying it upfront to not waste time, etc.
There’s good advice there. I’m not sure another post asking the same question was needed within 24 hours. Especially one that claims people were giving shit advice in the first when they definitely were not.
Every man is different, just as every woman is different. Some men don’t even want sex at all (called asexual)
Sex twice a week, will seem like a lot for some couples. Twice a week is way more normal than you think. I believe you’re overthinking this.
Go on some dates. When you find someone you’re interested in ND you feel comfortable talking with him about it, disclose that you don’t want sex everyday, and you prefer twice a week or less. If he’s five with that, no problem. If he’s not fine with that, he’s not for you. It’s quite simple.
And again, twice a week is not a low sex drive.
At least 5 times a week imo
Always depends on your sex drive
Every man is a bit different with this. I know for me ideally 1-3 (preferably on the higher end) times a week would be best but I also know there’s times where you can’t fit it in.
Some men are going to want more sex and some are going to want less. It’s a matter of who they are, who you are, and if you two click in that department.
There’s no such thing.
The relationship requires sex, sure, because having sex is the physical expression of the love, care, attraction, and desire you’re supposed to feel for your partner.
Most couples end up having sex 2 to 3 times a week, especially long term couples, but there’s no such thing as a “minimum acceptable requirement” because it depends on each couple how much sexual activity they agree to have.
If there’s an incompatibility about sex drive/expected frequency of sex, that will cause problems within the couple, which doesn’t bode well.
It depends on your partner. I’ve been with men who had lower sex drives and others with high sex drives. Personally, I have a high sex drive and I would like to meet a partner who has one as well. Ideally, I like to have sex 3-4 times a week. I’ve dated men who couldn’t do that for me and preferred less. You just have to communicate with them about the expectations of your sexual needs. You would have to compromise where you see fit so you both are happy.
My better half works m/f I am retired I try not to bother her mon thru Thursday but fri,sat,Sunday I want to have sexual intercourse.Remember there is a difference between having sex and sexual acts.My sex drive is much higher then hers and there are times it can be very frustrating when she doesn’t want it so I try to understand but I wait all week to fuck her good and have great sexual experiences meaning everything not just straight intercourse.During the week I can get by with a quickie or head that will make me cum.Sometimes though it may only be on a Friday or Saturday when we really have great sex. So my advice is obvious at least 2 times a week and every thing from sucking to fucking and whatever he likes find his fantasy and he will make you a happy woman. If you do Everything he wants sexually at home he won’t need anything from anyone else unless he’s just a scumbag. Good luck.
If were not having sex close to every day, I don’t want it.
The average of what each of you expect.
I don’t understand these questions
There are 4,000,000,000 men in the world, about 1b of those are children, so that leaves about 3,000,000,000 adult men
Do you think that there is a consensus amongst the 3b adult men? Do you think they’ve gathered here to form that consensus? What kind of answer were you expecting to this question?
If you have a low sex drive and only desire sex 1-2 times a week then find a man with a low sex drive who is also happy with sex 1-2 times a week. You don’t need to stay single because o this, just make it a conversation to have when you start dating. “Hey how important is sex to you in a relationship and how frequent do you think sex should occur”.
There’s no “acceptable amount of sex a man requires”. Sex isn’t a quota you should feel expected to meet.
Depends on your age. A guy in his 20s is generally going to want it multiple times a day. By 30s, one or 2 times a week is just fine and you shouldn’t have much trouble finding that
>I have a lower sex drive so one or two times a week is okay for me. I’m a woman btw so just wondering if this is realistic or should I just stay single forever.
DATE SOMEONE ELSE
Incompatible sex drives can’t be “fixed”, there’s no scenario here where one of you doesn’t become miserable… You two are INCOMPATIBLE!
> I should let my partner cheat on me then
It’s not cheating if you let him. It’s called an “open relationship”.
>no healthy man would be okay with having sex so little
This is just simply untrue, all men are different.
> is realistic or should I just stay single forever
Well, that’s a little drastic. You should find a partner that compliments your lifestyle and personal expectations. You probably need an older, or at least more mature partner, the horny every day thing is a very late teens early 20s thing, and it mellows out for most people later on, not that sex isn’t welcome every day, they just get less pushy about it.
Everyone is different, nothing is forever, just keep an open mind and keep looking until you find someone that is the right fit for you.
When you say sex are you talking all sexual acts? As a guy in my 40’s nearing my 50’s twice a week would probably be enough for me if you were still physical. If you still held each other kissed and possibly did oral or even the occasional hand job. Now if you didn’t want to be touched in between that would be a problem, and I know you didn’t say that. I agree with a lot of people it might be more than 2 times in the beginning though.
I commented on your previous post, but I’ll do it again if thats what you need.
Sex isn’t a currency you have to exchange a specified amount of, some people never have sex, and some have multiple times a day. The MOST IMPORTANT part is that you find out what is good for you, and don’t overstep that.
Make it clear early on what you are looking for and that maybe your libido/sex drive isn’t so high. This way you’ve clearly communicated early on what you want, and this will help weed out those that want something else. Just remember to be firm, don’t let others push you past what you are comfortable with. That will never end happily.
Listen to the positive advice people are giving, the world is not like what the trolls or intrusive thoughts are telling you.
Good luck stranger