We have to use lube even though I’m wet otherwise it’s uncomfortable for me during sex, but then when I’m feeling like I’m about to orgasm my vagina tense up so much it becomes painful. It’s so frustrating. It’s not vaginismus nor lack of arousal, my vagina just seems too small, we thought it would get better the more we have sex but actually I feel like it’s worse because now I enjoy sex but end up frustrating because I can’t orgasm and I have to ask my bf to pull out when it hurts.
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An orgasm is muscle contractions. I experience a tensing of muscles right before I come, not just my vagina, but my pelvic floor, butt, core. It’s never so much clenching that penetration hurts, however.
My best advice for now is to try to get your orgasm done before penetration so you don’t have that problem.