I know I don’t want to waste my 20s being sad about being alone but I also don’t want to get bullied or rejected again. Being alone is safe and it’s comfortable. Talking to people is uncomfortable and being socially awkward can cause them to bully you, be shady or talk about you. I hate it. When I did a public facing job I never really made friends with any of my coworkers in fact some of them thought I was weird. I had to deal with bullying at that job, being called autistic etc. With roommate it was the same situation and even online I have a hard time. I joined so many Discord servers and could not find one to fit into to.
As much as I want to be doing things some weekends or be able to have a group of friends I can text and that will hang out with me I just can’t do it after being rejected for so long. I’m about to spend my birthday alone again. And I’m upset because I just can’t do it. I hate it. I don’t want to be treated badly because of how I am again. I don’t want to turn 30 and look back at all the years I wasted scared but I don’t want to be bullied again. Does anyone else feel this way?
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Yeah pretty much word for word. I had social anxiety in school so that sucked and i still have social anxiety now. The only thing i have going for me is my famiky and some of my co workers are very friendly and talkative but i dont have friends outside of work or family.