it’s unbelievable. i’m YOUNG. i’m at the ripe age of 19, and i’m supposed to be thriving—i have a lot of friends, i have the most stellar grades, i belong in multiple organizations, i belong in the student council, and safe to say my physical appearance is a prominent characteristic of my image. i’m what you can say, “they have it all,” but why is it that every time i’m alone, i realize that nothing out of that really gives me happiness. there’s this eternal vacuum inside me that perpetually sucks the life out of me, but i don’t know why.
my heart says it’s craving for romantic affection, romantic love; but i’m way too critical to be in love. i rarely feel that way, and out of everyone, i just don’t like any. and it’s exhausting me. people would tell me to “don’t rush it,” but it’s the loneliness that’s killing me, not the fantasy of being in love.
1 comment
There’s a difference between success and fulfillment. It sounds like you got a good resume, but that doesn’t actually mean you’re happy.
At 19, you’re at the age where external forms of validation begin mattering less. Sure, it’s important to have good grades, be active in different groups, and be social.
However, you also have the growing need for internal validation, by which I mean that you feel content with yourself. You have more freedom as you approach your twenties to choose how you want to spend your life, and time is finite, so it’s an important choice to make.
Loneliness can be painful, but the answer isn’t always a romantic relationship. Strong friendships can be a healthier support network than desperately searching for that special person and solely depending on them to bring you happiness.
At the end of the day, if you can’t be content with yourself, no one else can change that.