What are some signs of low self esteem that you detect in a woman?

30 comments

1. I have this sense that she’s low self esteem if she tries too hard to look good/fashionable. For example, a lot of makeup to hide what she really looks like.

2. [deleted]

3. Bringing up accomplishments no one asked about.

   Pity party/playing the victim with the hope of fishing for compliments and validation.

   Edit:
   Spelling

4. Can’t take a compliment. Somehow turns into an argument.

5. Can never find something to wear.

6. Dating me!

7. They are attracted to me.

8. I’ll catch heat for this, high body count.

9. She needs constant validation and can’t make her own decisions. If you compliment her, she’ll think you’re lying or she’s overly critical about herself and beats herself up over relatively minor mistakes.

10. If she’s talking with me.

11. If they have an Instagram posting selfies. If you need the constant validation of others than you probably aren’t secure in yourself.

12. Selfies

13. How do you guys feel about women who put other women down unprovoked?

14. Tattoos in sexual or sexually suggestive places, like the tramp stamp, titty tats, or bikini line tats.

15. “Sex work”

    I know, I know, reddit hates objective behavioural analysis on about them but women who choose to be sirens usually hate themselves as much as they hate men and feel entitled to their money

16. When you complement them they deny it.

17. Always makes the same face in pictures because she’s calculated that it makes her appear most attractive, rather than just rolling with the vibe and having a nice memento of the occasion

18. Constantly begging you or men in general. Have you tried just being kind?

19. They always complain about what they perceive to be men’s beauty standards.

20. Excessive tattoos

21. Jealousy
    Constantly being in competition with other women
    Lack of trust
    Defensiveness
    Inability to take accountability
    Inability to apologize

    But most of these can also be applied to men.

    I’m a hetero woman, btw.

22. I think a lot of answers are wrong.

    I have very low self-esteem, that’s why I don’t post selfies, I don’t need validation and I am very independed. I wear makeup maybe 2-3x/month

    But I think men don’t find me attractive, so I don’t date or even try to. I don’t flirt (very bad at it).

23. excessive make up.

24. She will look at the floor instead of into your eyes when you are chatting

25. The kind of fidgeting that indicates a perfect awareness of all the little aspects of her outward appearance.

    In that moment, their dominant thought is making sure her posture is perfect, her make-up is flawless, her purse it at the right angle, dress is not crumpled up, fearing that if their exoskeleton shows cracks, people might start to peer inwards and discover the emptiness she deep down knows lies beneath.

26. Inability to accept compliments.

    I dated a girl like 15 years ago that never believed me when I’d say nice things to her. For some reason she just assumed I was lying and sometimes it even made her uncomfortable. Eventually it led to us breaking up. I’m not sure where she is nowadays but I hope she finally sees in herself what I saw.

27. Constantly seeking compliments

    In some cases, over vulgarity & constantly half nekked.

28. Speaking as someone who had and I am not joking zero self esteem for a few years. It’s hard to dig yourself out of it. Worse of all you fight with those you want to help. Avoiding others is a great sign also them not even responding to a “Hi or Hello”

29. Putting themselves down or putting themselves last in situations they may want to actively participate in.

    Won’t look too long into your eyes, especially if they have a rising crush

30. They are whinny af about themselves.