Dating an Emotionally Unavailable Woman – Seeking Perspective

Hi all,

Just got out of dating a girl who I believe to be emotionally unavailable. We hit it off during 2 months of talking and dating. Through our dates, I noticed everything was surface level and we did not have deep emotional intimacy or talking, it was surface level flirting. I noticed she really didnt care to divulge deeper discussion or ask me a lot about my life.

Everything seemed great and then on our 5th date we had a sleepover together at her apartment. She mentioned I was the first guy to sleep over since her breakup. After that night I noticed her mood changed with me a lot. She became a lot more hostile and irratible with me over text and then we met again on our 6th date. I was really unsure where we stood so I asked her if she liked me and she said “I do” and then asked me if I liked her which I said “I do”. 24 hours later she sends me a text saying she was thinking about how she said she likes me and that she just got out of a 5 year relationship 3 months before she met me and just wants to focus on her self.

I later find out that her past relationship ended due to her boyfriend getting arrested by the FBI for a $2m embezzlement scheme where he was stealing funds from banking clients and using it to trade stocks. He is currently facing 30 years in prison. It seems like she just wants to have fun on dates and have physical intimacy. I’m hurt because I genieunly liked her and wanted to get to know her on a deeper level and build something with her but it felt like a wall was up the entire time.