So for context, me and my bf have been dating for 9 months and I recently got into smoking (began smoking in February). At first it was occasionally with friends but ever since I bought a dab pen, I’ve been smoking almost every single day since about April. I want to tell my bf but he quit a while ago and he is also really against smoking/drinking in general because he’s had bad experiences with that and he’s also pretty Christian. I feel bad hiding such things from him and literally every time he calls me I’m practically high and even most of the time when we hang out I’ll be high but he never notices. And it’s like an altered personality in a way because I’m not always myself when I’m high. I would say I’m pretty good at acting sober because I have strict parents but it feels so wrong because he doesn’t know. I want to tell him but I feel like he would react badly since I told him once I got drunk and he got mad. I understand where he’s coming from and I know he wants the best for me but I don’t know if I’m going to tell him because I might plan on quitting soon. If I become addicted, I will have to figure out a way to tell him because I shouldn’t be hiding such big things from him.
4 comments
You should definitely quit if you want to stay with him, it sounds like a big dealbreaker for him.
if you want to keep going, you’ll have to accept that he might break up with you over it.
It sounds like you may have developed a dependency on the dab pen. It’s wrong to lie to him and you should be honest. Expect him to break off the relationship if you aren’t willing to stop.
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> I might plan on quitting soon. If I become addicted
Be honest with yourself about this – are you actually wanting to quit or do you just want to absolve yourself of the guilt of lying to your bf?
You sound hooked. Acting sober. Using at the stake of loosing things you hold more important. Lying and betraying his trust. Don’t have to quit, but you’ve got to tell him the truth if you don’t.
Trust is the base for all relationships.
If he cannot trust you, he will bounce, and so will every other dude.