I hit it off with a tinder date last night, we were talking for a week and met for the first time. He had lots of green flags and was very vocal about wanting to keep a connection with me and taking things in a more serious direction. We talked about our relationship pasts, he shared he’s been single for 2 years coming from a 5 year relationship.
This morning I looked through his IG highlights, I tend to look at a guy’s online pictures/stories again if I find I am very into them. I ran into his dog’s profile and it featured him and the ex. There are pictures from last year with captions obviously showing they were still together at the time. I found the ex’s profile through that, and she has two videos, one from this June showing him and the dog on vacation with her, and another one in September stating she is working out now that she is newly single.
So I completely feel lied to, he said he’s been single for two years yet there is literal online proof of them still dating up to this year. I am very sensitive to being lied to because my ex lied frequently especially during the beginning. I don’t know why he lied about this because I wouldn’t have minded him being honest about being newly single. I don’t know how to approach this situation as he was so great and vocal about wanting to continue this with me, he definitely would go out of his way for me. But this lie makes me afraid that he is capable of lying about other things too. I’m scared to lose out on him but this sounds like a red flag. How do I approach him about the timelines not adding up?
TLDR; A guy I started seeing told me he’s been single for 2 years but there is online proof he just got out of a relationship, how do I approach him about this?
7 comments
Lying right out of the gate? I would be worried
Yeah. No he lied about it. He is comfortable at lying. This is an ick for me. Don’t be a rebound girl. He might shower you with all love and care. You never know what is going inside his head.
For instance my ex got married and he showers all the love and everything to his wife. I can see all the photos she posts. But he still texts me everyday how much he misses me and thinks about me all day and night. Poor wife has no idea.
So be wary. Be cautious girl.
He didn’t have to lie. He chose to. And if he’s willing to lie about this, he can lie about anything.
You’ve known him for a whole week, and already figured out he’s full of shit. Bouncing should be easy.
Yeah, leave this dude. Good on you for doing the research on him. If timelines don’t add up to first impressions, you are most wise to leave as soon as you can.
You don’t. Just block him and move on. He’s too old for you and he’s a liar.
Lies add up over time. First it’s this, then it’s something else. Then you find out that the entire relationship was a lie and you’ve just wasted a bunch of time. Good for you for doing your homework!
This is a red flag, and should be a non-negotiable that someone be up front with you. Hard pass on this guy.
Please do not do this. Not only did he lie, but there’s a very slim possibility he’s ready to be in a relationship having only been single for 3 months after a 5 year relationship. Even if he’s acting super into it, it’s probably because he doesn’t want to be alone.