To be clear, I am not the kind of boyfriend that likes to ‘keep tabs’ on my girlfriend. We can see each other’s location and battery percentage on Life 360, but neither of us really checks it all that much. We’re both independent and I have absolutely no issue with her going out and having a good time with her friends. My only problem is that she will go out to bars with her phone at less than 15% battery and constantly gets herself into situations where her phone is dead and she is relying on people she barely knows to contact me or give her a ride home. Am I overstepping if I ask her to at least make sure her phone is charged?
31 comments
That’s not a ridiculous request. Just make sure it’s coming from a good place. Offer to buy a power brick or remind her to charge it when she’s getting ready
“Hey so I worry when I can’t reach you or your phone is dead and you may need it so is there anything I can do to help remind you or keep it charged?”
Why doesn’t she charge it
There’s no harm in asking if it’s coming from a place of safety. But no need to he frustrated if she’s going out with friends who can help her out.
Nah, you’re not wrong for being concerned. It’s not about keeping tabs; it’s about safety, especially when she’s out late. Just let her know you’d feel better if she charged her phone before heading out.
Rather than frustrated/ angry, it sounds like you’re worried about her/ care for her safety and are upset that she gets in situations where you end up scared/ unsure if she’ll be okay which is valid.
That being said, pretty sure she might need a new phone. I get that as a responsible adult ideally one would charge the battery if it’s low, but realistically folks are busy and it’s a pain to charge your phone mid-day/ it’s a bit crazy that it’s battery is so bad that it doesn’t last the whole day. I mean unless she uses it constantly (which how can she if she works?) it’s bizarre that it’s dying so much. It might be worth it to get her a new phone/ upgrade, mine is a few years old but the battery easily lasts for 20 hour if I’m not playing videos a bunch/ using GPS for hours in a row. (I get that a new phone might not be financially feasible, but wanted to suggest it in case it was)
She is bad at adulting
Completely reasonable to ask, if you want to help her grown up better get her a little power bank. I recently bought myself a MagSafe Anker one in pink so that it stood out from my other stuff (and makes me less likely to lose it). Mine is for when I’m out for long work days but it’s dinky and would fit in a little handbag just fine.
If she carries on like this she’s greatly increasing her chances of something bad happening whether it’s by her own hand or someone else’s.
Buy her a powerbank to keep with her when she goes out.
i saw power brick being suggested a lot; maybe even get her a wireless charger for her desk so that she has a visual cue front and center in an area she spends a significant amount of time in, to reminder her to put her phone on it. also its less effort than plugging in
If you agreed on it, no. Also, why is she going out to bars? The bar is a meat market.l, in case you didn’t know.
Bro I hate to tell you this is probably planned. She doesn’t want you checking in on her so it’s just an excuse. Either that or she doesn’t give a crap about you.
She’s an adult. It’s her mess. Let her deal with it. Eventually she’ll get tired of her phone dying. Next time she goes out let her know you are going to bed at “X” time so if she needs to contact you, it needs to be before then. If she wants a ride from you, it needs to be prearranged since she can’t be relied upon to be reachable.
I guess ultimately I’m saying don’t demand she charge her phone, just stop enabling her. Don’t bail her out when her poor planning causes a problem. I’m saying this as a fellow flaky person like your girlfriend.
Nah this is normal and totally okay. I have a lot of anxiety around my wife’s phone dying while she’s out, just because I have trauma around a loved one dying in a car accident on her way to come see me. My wife and I are also very independent, as well as open, so I don’t mind her being out at all! But I need her phone charged so that if she’s out later than expected or needs help or anything, I know she can contact me.
Sometimes she forgets, because she has ADHD. Sometimes, if I see her phone her phone is dying while she’s getting ready to go out, I just plug it in real quick. I bought her a little car charger that she keeps in her cigarette lighter, which helps, and she has a power brick in her purse for emergencies. It’s a normal thing to fret about, just let her know WHY you’re worried so she doesn’t get the wrong idea, if you’re worried about that.
She should already know better. You ain’t her Daddy.
That is just proper adulting.
You should simply gift her a portable solar powered power supply fully charged. The next time her phone dies, she can pull it out of her pocket book, plug her phone into it, and dial away. When she gets home, she can plug both phone and power supply in at the same time and recharge both.
‘Nuff said.
She WANTS her phone to run out. She doesn’t want you to know where she is. You can’t track her and she doesn’t have to lie to you.
Just out of curiosity, how much interaction do you think your wife has with men when she’s out ar bars with the girls?
She is 25, if she can’t remember to charge her phone. My first thought is she does it on purpose. But who knows. Maybe she is just that much of a scatter brain
Yeah, she’s the kind of chick who’s gonna find herself stranded on the wrong side of town, with a killer clown stalking her, and a phone that dies just when she needs it most.
For safety she needs a charged phone period
Title only: feelings are never wrong
> can see each other’s location and battery percentage on Life 360, but neither of us really checks it all that much.
Whats the point?
>Am I overstepping if I ask her to at least make sure her phone is charged?
No. She asking u to help & potentially leaving herself vulnerable
Gift her a back up battery.
Those of you suggesting a power bank – even that needs to be charged once used. If OP’s GF does not rmber to charge cell before going out unlikely they will rmber to charge something that anticipates a dead cellphone. This sounds like a communication issue to me. Tell her that not being able to reach her or her asking strangers for rides worries you.
Not at all. My husband would be pissed if I made this a habit. Although.. we’ve been through some shit that makes us worrywarts, always needing to know the other is safe. Overall it’s just safer to have your phone. Portable chargers are cool. If she caries a bag then keep one in there for her (?)
It’s a perfectly reasonable request and ” do you think it might be easier for you to make sure your phone has a bit more charge if you’re going to be out late, just in case?” really shouldn’t be a comment anyone should be making a fuss about. But if she’s not willing to, that’s up to her and any consequences are on her.
Does she have phone charging problems all the time or just when she goes out to the bars without you?
Is she forgetful about things like this otherwise? Because if she is, then that’s a larger pattern to deal with and if she isn’t, then I’d worry that it’s intentional to get around any tracking and let her be “unreachable” while she’s out while still being able to say “but honey, I can’t be cheating on you, you can track my location!”
Seems intentional. She’s keeping her options open.
Remember most every guy at that bar wants to/would have sex with her. A good relationship should be protected.
Why does she need to receive attention from other men. Totally unacceptable for a real man. An intelligent loyal woman does normal activities with her friend and doesn’t participate in activities for single people without her bf/husband.
So yeah, grow a set of balls and set some boundaries. This is your life bro. You’re not kids anymore.
I will probably get downvoted for this, but here it goes:
Does she have a second phone by any chance? I mean I don’t want to plant ideas in your brain but every people I know always charge their phone at least to 50% before going out for the exact reasons you have listed. To me it feels a little suspicious that the phone you can keep a tab on is always running out of juice when she goes out so that you can’t see where she is.
U r acting like a needy guy who has no other woman as options/ this is repulsive to women! Stop it 😂please
Buy her 2 cheap portable charging power banks, and make sure she has a fresh one in her purse.