I (24M) have had a horrible dating history. I’ve been cheated on twice by 2 different girls. My ex that I considered the one died of cancer. And most girls I’ve dated end with them telling me, “They don’t feel anything.” I am a hopeless romantic and cheesy as hell.
My Fwb (22F) has had a horrible dating history too. (I’m going to refer to her as AS from now on) AS got cheated on, she broke up with a good guy because she wasn’t ready for commitment in high school, and she had a physically abusive relationship. And she is currently emotionally detached. She has stated that she will be alone forever
We started talking about a few years ago but we knew each other in high school. We recently started talking about a month ago and somehow we ended up in a fwb relationship. Our sexual chemistry is strong and our emotional chemistry is spotty at times. She opens up to me and tells me personal stuff, so personal her best friend doesn’t even know. (Also as I am writing this the best friend is out of the picture for good they had a fight)
I know I should not have feelings for AS but she is someone I care about. So much so, I am willing to never have another relationship until this one ends. She makes me happy and I make her happy. Idk if I want to be more than friends or if I feel this way because I’m lonely (I’m not that lonely I have friends that I surround myself with but I mean like relationship-wise). She is fine with being alone the rest of her life but also is kinda dependent on me as her only friend. She used to push me away a lot but now she pulls me in closer and tells me a lot more about her.
I’m confused and want to figure out what to do. Do I slowly try to go for a relationship (like over years)? Do I just maintain Fwb? Do I end it so I could find someone that has the same feelings as me? Also why does she cling to me but also push me away? Or what should I do with an emotionally detached person?