My new boyfriend of a couple months touched me in my sleep, and I enjoyed it. First while we were napping, then in the morning, then again while napping. I would “fall asleep first” (pretending to sleep) while in a spooning position. I could feel him get hard from just spooning, and that turns me on. After not moving for a bit, he would start my touching my back then work his way down to where my butt and legs connect. Then move his hand into my shorts and start rubbing my clit and finger me lightly. All while I’m pretending to sleep. Then when he stops, after a another 10 mins I’ll pretend to wake up and he’ll start doing it again.
I never brought up how I’ve always had the kink of wanting to be touched in my sleep, always just wished he would just start doing it. So when he did without being asked, really turned me in and got me wet. Sometime I wish he would have sex with me while I slept.
Is this normal or weird? Should I tell him I know he’s touching me, and enjoy it?
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I don’t think it’s weird to want sex when you sleep, I think we just all have our own preferences. I think the best thing to do in this (and honestly, most) situations is to have open communication. Tell him what turns you on. He can’t give you what you want/like/need if he doesn’t know. It’s really cool that he naturally started doing it, but who knows what he’s thinking? Maybe it’s something that he also wants to do (sex while you’re asleep)? Maybe he starts then stops because he thinks he might be violating you without getting your consent? Maybe it’s unconscious behavior on his part? Or maybe something neither you nor i have thought of? In a similar vein, maybe there are things that you do or don’t do that he wants more or less of? The best way to increase sexual compatibility is to ask, talk and listen. Good luck! ❤️
Omg Ive been telling my husband how I would sooo love to wake up being touched/messed with. Idk why it turns me on but it does. I also have this thing for if I were to wake up and find him masturbating and walk in on him masturbating. It’s just a big turn on for me. I could look at his dick all day 😂
Tell him you liked it
Or if you don’t want to be direct about it, play dumb and tell him you “had a dream” he was doing it and it turned you on.
You should really get consent involved in this
My ex and I had a great system to deal with this. If we went to bed with underwear (bottoms), we didn’t want to be woken up. But if we went to bed naked, we were free to be touched/ played with/ even if asleep.
Me and my fiance talked about doing this
Perfectly Normal. Mrs loves being woken already filled.
Sometimes she does the pretending to sleep or she will wake up as Mr Enters her
I’ve shared with my partners in the past that I enjoyed it. That it’s something that really turns me on and honestly it’s a bigger turn on for me than foreplay and I’m a kinky bitch lol. There’s nothing wrong with it. Just tell him it’s something you really want to try and that he has your permission.
If you are unaware, the name for this kink is Somnophilia.
Absolutely not weird! This is my biggest fantasy!
It’s not common, but definitely not rare. Also totally normal, if you talk about it, clearly and explicitly. When it comes to CNC type of play, you have to just be direct in what you’re consenting to and what you’re not.
Hello! This is a kink I used to have. I come from a judgement-free place and hope you read this comment!
Please make sure that your boyfriend will stop if you want him to stop, or have nights where you’re wanting to get your sleep. My ex boyfriend did not respect my wishes after a certain point and it led to me being in a really dark place mentally because my body reacted one way, but my mind didn’t want anything to do with it.
I was so tired. He raped me for way too many months and always gaslit me with “well, you came, you liked it.” or some variation. Consent is very important. Make sure your boyfriend respects it so you both can continue to have fun! 😉
I have the same kink. Completely normal.
That’s a gamble if I’ve heard on lmao
Not weird cuz I have the same kink lol. My bf just falls asleep before I do cuz he’s a dad and I have insomnia lol 🤣
I think it’s very weird and disconcerting that he’s doing this without your consent.
Yes in this case you’re actually enjoying, but…he doesn’t know that? He’s sexually touching you thinking you’re not aware of it, thinking you’re asleep.
Imo it doesn’t matter here if you’ve discovered a new kink or not. If it’s his kink, he’s involving you without your consent. What kind of a man does that? He must have done this to other girls as well, what if they never even found out he does this or what if they broke up because of this?
Parasomnia is the result of your brain being caught between sleep stages. This in-between phase may make you act like you’re awake when you’re still asleep. People with sexsomnia experience sleep-related sexual behavior. These behaviors range from masturbation to sexual intercourse.
I was woken up with a bj once. One of the best sexual experiences i ever had
Sleep sex is very hot if your both consenting.
I do this exact thing all the time with my girlfriends. It’s just part of cuddling imo. There’s been a bunch of times, even when we were actually asleep, that I wake up and get close to her and just start feeling her and she starts to wake up and we both get into it. I don’t think any of this it out of the ordinary at all. It’s just nice tbh.
It’s a mildly uncommon thing, but somnophilia is a pretty well known kink thing. As long as there is a marker of some kind for consent, then it shouldn’t be a problem to engage in that sort of play.
please talk to your partner about it, like your kinks, when to engage in it, what they’re limited to etc. otherwise, that’s technically sexual assault because you’re not able to consent to it.
It’s concerning that he did it without your prior consent and without discussing it first. Personally I love it too but my partners and I always discuss it before hand. This conversation would be very different if you hadn’t liked it and personally, this would be a red flag for me.
my ex and i had this thing, i absolutely love waking up with him inside me already lol
My girl and I used to do this all the time. We both thought it was super hot. We had standing consent, never had a problem. She’s a heavy sleeper, and I would be holding her, and lightly brushing my fingers along her stomach and kissing her neck. I’d keep this up for awhile and her pussy would be flowing like a creek, super wet and pulsating. Depending on how she was laying I’d rub her clit the way she likes, or go down on her, flicking her engorged clit with my tounge lightly while sucking on it. She would have a HUGE orgasm, shaking uncomfortable for 10 min or so. She would wake up AS she came.
On the flip side, she would get me hard as I slept and would suck me to the point of being rock solid, on the edge of cummig. I’d wake up about then and she would suck my soul through my penis, and just sit on it. Grinding furiously until I exploded and filled her up. I love if when she keeps riding, and her and my cum pushes me out as she forces me back in. It’s so hot that I cum again.
Anyway, I don’t think you’re weird or whatever. It’s so incredibly hot. Nothing else makes me explode like that, and I’d do it every night if I could.
It’s great that you enjoy it, but I still find it concerning that he just does that without having discussed it prior if you are ok with that/into that. He doesn’t know if he has consent or not.
My wife has given me a “Free Use” card, which extends to sleep time. Her way of letting me know she would rather not be bothered during the night is to put on a sleep shirt or a nightie. No top means go for it if I want, top on means, please let me sleep. That works well for us. She only uses a top if she’s had a long tough day or anticipates a rough day & wants to be well rested to handle it.
yes!! so ask for sex!!
This is great that you like it. But these things should be discussed and consented to before he does it.
As some1 hella into cnc not weird. Just tell him fr
Nope not weird at all, it’s one of my biggest turn ons too, you should tell him about the sex thing I’m sure he’ll be down
I also like to be touch while I’m asleep.
It’s not weird. Simply tell him you like it. I’ve had a rule with pretty much every gf that it’s ok to do this, no one has objected.
Somnophilia is a pretty well established kink. Falls under the consensual non consent umbrella, and is frankly in the milder end of the spectrum for it. It’s a fun thing and it being “normal” or not doesn’t mean much in the grand scheme. I’d very much recommend you talk to each other about it and establish some boundaries, just to be safe and make it an actually intentional practice. But otherwise, both of you go have fun and enjoy yourselves!
I do this subconsciously in my sleep. My hands are always all over my bed partner.
Normal
This kink is called somnophilia and is very common.
Yes you should talk to your boyfriend about what you like and don’t like, otherwise you risk him doing something you don’t like bc he doesn’t know any better. Like what if he started fingering your asshole next time? Let him know the boundaries, and if you don’t know the boundaries, explore them slowly together.
Technically, what was done to you would be considered rape by the police. I realize you trust your boyfriend and what he did to you has nothing to do with rape or sexual assault, it’s a couple exploring their sexuality. Consent is more complicated than what the police can account for. But imagine if you were a person who would never want to be touched in their sleep, he could have traumatized you. So tell him for his sake as well, I very much doubt he intentionally would ever want to run the risk of traumatizing you.
The reason I’m being a bit of a wet blanket is because I am one of these cautionary tales myself. I thought romance and sex all needed to just be understood immediately between each other and happen by itself perfectly. And never talked to my partner about things because it “would kill the mood” and “wasn’t cool”. And I had some really traumatizing stuff happen to me.
Don’t be like me, learn from the people who have been doing kink for decades 🙂
Say something. If you didnt enjoy this, it would be rape.
He should have asked before touching you while you sleep.
The people here saying “ask if it was a dream” are delusional.
I’m glad you enjoy it, because it would be a case if you didnt.
TALK to him about it. Make sure you both communicate these things.
You just made me realize that this is one of my kinks too!
I remember waking up at my boyfriend’s house as the inside spoon the morning after we had sex for the first time. I think what woke me was feeling his hand slowly traveling from my stomach back towards my hip. When his fingers reached where the waistband of my panties would normally be, he realized that I wasn’t wearing any.. then I felt his fingers grip my hip as he shifted his body lower to rub his dick between my pussy lips. As soon as his dick touched my pussy I heard a sharp intake of breath followed by “oh shit..” (he must’ve been surprised at how wet I already was). Then he pulled his hips back, dragging his full length back over my pussy until I felt his cockhead at my opening. In one stroke he quickly rammed himself home—now it was my turn to gasp, as I was suddenly/deliciously full of all of him (to this day, he was the biggest cock that I’ve ever had). Now both of us were panting as he held himself deep inside for a few moments before fucking me in earnest, firmly grabbing both of my hips from behind—god he was so deep.. I couldn’t stop myself from moaning so loudly. He started with these longer, slower strokes—they drove me crazy. I panted “please.. please fuck me..” then as he picked up the pace, I relished the sound of our bodies slamming together and the lewd sound that my wet pussy made as he fucked the shit out of me. Mmm.. his thrusts started to become frantic, his breathing was so heavy, and I felt him start to swell inside me (I’m pretty much crying out in ecstasy at this point), then he pulled out and came all over my back.
This was many years ago now. God I wish that once I could’ve felt his ginormous dick pump his seed inside of me.
Nothing weird about this, my girlfriend and I constantly touch each other when we’re either about to fall asleep or when we’re briefly awake in the morning. I usually start off by fondling her neck and back, then start caressing her breast which turns her on hugely, so she usually then starts gently jerking me off. It’s a nice way to go back to sleep again, and we do it without even talking to each other.