I don’t usually post stuff but I’m at a loss I know reddit might not be the place to get comforting words but oh well. Any advice stories anything helps. My husband and I have only been together 2 yrs married 8 months. He has a drug use history so I always knew there would be a possibility of relapse. Well a few months ago I found meth in his pocket he tried to deny it but then came up with some elaborate story on how it wasnt his. Even tho I knew it was a lie I let it go.. well over time I started noticing things not sleeping staying up 14 hrs playing Xbox mood changes not eating weight loss doing “tweaker” things around the house like randomly spray painting our shed at 4 in the am more things but anyway so I came home early the other day from work and caught him with it he hurried threw it under his ass (was sitting in a saucer chair) well I went to grab for it after I done seen it sitting on the floor and he went physcotic threatening to punch me in the face break my arm (he’s never a violent person) well he would not let me reach near him would not get out of the chair so I dumped him out of the chair it went flying i was trying to grab it and he tackled me bashed my head off the wall when he landed on me he ended up dislocating my ankle. At this point I called the police and he took off outside (assuming to hide the drugs) cops came I had to go to the hospital I told them to search my house and property they wouldn’t they only checked his person and of course he already hid it somewhere. Well I told him unless he told me the truth I was filing for divorce he still refuses to tell me the truth and swears that he wasn’t doing anything. I’ve been with addicts before I know how it goes I just so badly don’t want our marraige to be over but I’m also not gonna have drugs in my life around my kids or be lied to. He came to get his clothes and stuff and just cries saying he doesn’t want to leave I’ve told him all he has to do os tell me the truth and we can try to fix things and he just can’t do it.. I love my husband more than anything this is killing me.. has anyone ever had a relationship with an addict that could finally admit to there wrongs and change??
14 comments
I think you know the answer to this and you’ve likely heard of all the damage that Meth can do. I’m sorry. Get yourself and your kids into a safe environment and accept the Meth has taken him and he’s gone.
I’d only ever consider going back if he gets rehab and is clean for several months and can prove it and then continues to prove it when we’re back together trying to rebuild.
He has a drug use history …I stopped reading. I think we know what you should do.
IT won’t stop until he hits rock bottom, while on the way there he will destroy everything around him.
Meth is a low bottom drug. He’s either going to turn around in the near future, or he’s going to go even deeper into the pit. You’ll know which it is within a week or so.
I hope you find peace outside of life with this man.
You can’t save him. Read this again: YOU CANT SAVE HIM.
There’s no point giving ultimatums when he won’t even be honest with himself or you.
You’re going to run yourself into the ground trying to squeeze the truth out of him.
Yes you can love him with all you have but you know from your past, it doesn’t work.
You CANNOT bring your children up in a volatile home.
He is not stable, he is abusive he is an addict and your kids could be removed from your home because of his actions.
This is bigger than tell me the truth so I can forgive you and stay in this relationship.
Sadly the divorce was over when he risked your safety. This will only get worse in time.
His true love are drugs right now. How hard that truth is to accept.
god PLEASE dump him. you’re young & have a life ahead of you, please. he has a drug history & continues to relapse, he will continue. it’ll get worse, the violence towards you will get worse, your money will drain away along with your happiness & emotional/physical wellbeing. set a good example for your kids & leave the drug addict to hit rock bottom alone. you already offered support & he violently attacked you- it will not get better.
It’s begun.
You’re really glossing over the fact that he violently attacked you. Bashing your head?! He literally could have killed you or left you brain damaged. Next time you might not get off so “easy” with ‘just’ a broken ankle.
OP…please get yourself to a therapist and get that junkie abuser out of your life. There is no fairytale ending for you here.
Nope. Don’t even do it.
The lying/denial is extremely concerning. The second he got physical with you instead of owning what he was doing was him choosing the drugs over you. That is a huge red flag.
Spare yourself the years of pain and end it now…..it will only get worse.
Maybe the divorce will be a wake up call for him to clean his act up. Maybe not. Put yourself first OP.
Save yourself now. I’ve been going through this for 12 years. He was just diagnosed with a terminal illness directly caused by meth. I just knew he would quit. I just found out this weekend he didn’t. But he won’t admit to using, he never has unless I catch him red handed. Good luck to you OP. You’re in my thoughts.
Run! This will get worse.