Married for 10 yrs. Happy and we don’t have kids. Wife has health issues and many different doc opinions say it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to get pregnant. We’re happy with the pace of our life and not have children. I’d only slightly consider remarriage if she were to pass away due to her health stuff, and even then I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t want to procreate as she has been the only person I’ve ever considered having a child with plus I would be 40+ yrs old and don’t think I want to be changing diapers at that age. So should I bite the bullet and get a vasectomy?
(Please do not go to my profile, unless you want a NSFW view of me, Reddit is my outlet for my sexual frustrations. Don’t judge)
30 comments
You can always bank sperm “just in case” but if the two of you have made the decision — as it sounds like you have — that you don’t want kids, then sure, look into a vasectomy.
I had kids at 39 and 41 and had a vasectomy after #2 and don’t regret it at all. Sex without condoms is much better. The only weird thing was the doctor asked me if I wanted to take the little piece of vermicelli home with me(who would do that, am I going to get it bronzed ?)and when they cauterized me I realized I smelled like hamburger
Absolutely. Best decision I’ve ever made.
Under the circumstances you’ve described, I agree with you. I had mine done at 38. At the time I was recently divorced with a 10yr old son. I didn’t want to start over. One of the best decisions I made.
Do it! It’s a super easy procedure.
Had a vasectomy at 35 and was one of the best decision of my life. Since you don’t have children at all I would advise against it unless you k ow for 100% certainty that you do not want or desire children of your own
I had one and I highly recommend it
I would also highly suggest it. Its an easy process and not having to worry about pregnancy is a huge relief.
I would recommend you look into having some sperm frozen just in case your wife desires a chance to give birth at a future date.
DO IT!!! Best $900 we ever spent. My husband had it done when he turned 30 and the doctors really didn’t like the idea until they met me and I assure them no hell spawn would ever pass through my loins and we wanted his little swimmer capped off.
Sex, SO much better. I hadn’t even realized how horrible birth control was for my body and mental state until I was finally able to come off it. It had made me dry (down there), it killed my sex drive. Once I was off it it was like the flood gates opened and I was so freaking down, anytime, anyplace (well, legally and responsibly, except that one time in the back room at work). Not needing a bottle of lube was a game changer.
Happy humping, go get it done.
PS: my husband prepared a week off because he was worried about recovery. Procedure was like 10 minutes, he had a cold pack on his bits for a day then had a great week off relaxing. I don’t think he even took a single pain pill, but don’t be afraid to if you need it!
My vasectomy that I got at 25 was the best $70 I’ve ever spent.
I’ve done it. I’m 42 and got it done 10 years ago. We already had two kids and felt our family was complete, so I went ahead and did it. Absolutely great decision. Nothing changed other than we no longer have pregnancy stress and it’s raw all day every day.
My husband got a vasectomy at age 30. It’s been a little over two years now and it was the best decision! I also have health issues that put me in a very high risk category for pregnancy. Luckily, we had already decided we didn’t want kids before my health issues, so it made the decision to go through with the vasectomy a lot easier. Good luck!
the answer is yes.
Ask your wife how she feels. Are you both resolved to not have kids?
Is your marriage stable? Would you want kids with a subsequent wife or girlfriend?
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Answer those questions and you have your answer.
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You could bank some sperm. It has costs, but….
Well it was my own fault for letting my curiosity get the better of me I guess.
Go ahead and get the clip job. If you’re worried that you could change your mind, then bank some of your boys in case they need to swim again.
When I was in the OR about to get a Vasectomy, I raised my head and jokingly asked the surgical team if they could add a couple of inches while they were down there. At 7” and girthy, I really didn’t need it, although I figured that it never hurts to ask. The Doc, wanting to join-in on the fun, responded with “Oops, my knife just slipped!” At least the very cute, young nurses had a nice chuckle at our attempts at gallows humor.
Your body but if I was in your position yes. My husband had one in his early 40s. We don’t regret it.
I had mine done at your age. But I already had 2 kids. I couldn’t imagine raising a baby in my forties. My youngest was one year old when I had it done. Best choice I ever made.
I’ll play the part of the manly man who’s irrationally committed to virility he doesn’t really even want to use and overly protective of his balls here.
I got my vasectomy under protest. I don’t know exactly *why* I was and am so against it, but it’s a thing. It’s a feeling some guys have.
In spite of that, I went through with it. If you’re married and you don’t want to have kids or any more kids, I just don’t think there’s a *justifiable* argument not to do it. It’s all but totally risk free for you, while even the kindest forms of birth control have SOME level of risk for your wife. It plays havoc with their hormones regulation (though sometimes in a beneficial way, not knocking those instances), is One More Thing they need to stay on top of (as of she’s not already trying to do too much already).
I LOVE my balls and never want anyone to hurt them, and I LOVE not being “neutered,” but without question, I love my wife more than either of those things when it comes down to it.
Yes, absolutely, 100%, one of the best life decisions I have ever made, period. No hesitation on saying that.
Since you are asking some of these questions, you might want to read this:
https://sexyfunadvice.com/2023/10/common-vasectomy-myths-debunked/
This isn’t an advice comment, but rather a comment asking a similar question. I’m 19 and considering the same thing. I’ve learned sperm can be banked for up to 40-50 years or something like that. Way longer than I’ll ever need it to last. I don’t like the idea of children at all. I don’t know how I’d prevent them from becoming little monsters to society and they sound very restraining. My girlfriend is on the same page as I am. I’m super positive that I’ll marry her once I’m more financially stable. My question is; should I try to get a vasectomy? Maybe bank sperm just in case somehow, some way my mind changes in the future?
Best thing I ever did, super easy procedure too. I cream pie my girl every night without worry.
m42 here with one kid. I had a vasectomy after the kid was born. Zero regrets. You’re grown and you know yourself by now. If you don’t want kids, get it.
I have one kid and while I love them with all my heart, I knew early on that raising another from a baby was not for me. We are through the early childhood years now and on to the great years of parenthood, and I’m still 100% confident in my decision to get the vasectomy, and the lack of desire of another baby.
Some things
1. It hurt pretty good.
2. I had some pain in my testicles during sexual activity for a while afterward. It wasn’t bad pain, but more of a slight ache. Reduced the enjoyment of sexual activity by about 10-20% at most. In other words, things still felt good.
3. Orgasm did feel just a bit different for a while afterward
4. After a long while (a year?) that seemed to settle and things were back to normal. On occasion I still get a very slight ache in one or both testes but it’s not bad, doesn’t last long, and does not take away from sex.
5. No changes to mood and drive other than my just getting older, which for me is changing things but I cannot see how the vasectomy would alter that.
I (39f) was in a relationship for 17 years and when that ended 4 years ago. I knew I didn’t want anymore children. I started dating again and met my now bf 3 years ago. He’s snipped. If him and I ever split, a vasectomy will be a requirement. I don’t like birth control and never want to be on it again. A vasectomy is way easier and way more effective than any option for us women.
My brother (42) and my brother-in-law (36) both got snipped because neither of them and neither my SIL or my sister want to be pregnant again, nor do they want be on birth control again.
My wife and I have been married for 15 years and we’ve had a similar experience with her health and pregnancy just wasn’t a good option. I got mine last year and I can’t complain too much. In a way I hate not being a father, but at the same time, I also don’t want to be a widowed father
Yeah! Save half a million per kid too!
Do it! After 2 kids by 23 I got snipped before I was 24. Now that I’m nearing 36, I haven’t regretted it a day since. It’s been great for my sex life as I see women on the sly without having to worry about the wife finding out because I accidentally knocked one up
No, unless your wife is unable to be on any form of birth control for whatever reason.
True, not having to worry about other birth control is great, but:
1. It’s not completely painless, and sometimes healing is very painful. You’re mostly going to hear from the 99% of guys who don’t have complications. 1%er here to tell you you don’t want to be in that 1%.
2. It’s not always reversible. You never know how your life is going to turn out.
It’s a pretty simple procedure. Less than an hour, outpatient and I’ve never looked back, no more stress from the potential. ( but that was after my second kid, but if kids are important then there are always adoption or lots of foster kids needing a home)