I been involved in self development for over 10 years now, looking back the reason i started was purely for training and increasing my weight, its crazy how things change when now the last thing on my mind is how good my physique is, i am more interested in being more grounded and centred, what would you say as a man is the main areas of self development one should be working on
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I do think it’s different for everyone at different times, I’d say weight loss got me in, then it transferred to being good with women, then being well rounded with everyone. Stoicism, philosophy, finances all followed and I’d say I’ve greatly improved in all of those subjects and my views on them At sometime when those things had been mastered and during COVID I became really anxious about a lot of different things, not really sure when or how that changed, but that’s where my personal battle remains. The guy sitting next to me at work probably should learn many of those things or none, he could have no problems, or the order could be totally different.
Core strength and cardio for the physical side.
Managing your stress and not getting worked up about things for the mental side.
Time and financial management as well.
Healthier baseline lifestyle, whatever it happened to mean for you. You just want to be better next month than you are today. It stacks up over years
Its different for everyone because some aspects come more natural to some people than others. For me Im constantly trying to work on my social skills. Im naturally introverted but realize that giving into my introverted tendencies can hinder me. So Im always trying to push myself and learn to be more social and not just stand in the corner and look at my phone.
Social skills. The ability to relate to and get along with people. Knowing what actually makes you happy and going after it. Solving the various little problems in your life.
If I could only master one thing, it would be social skills. People make me happy and teach me everything I need to know. Not being able to talk to and learn from them would be crippling.
Knowledge
For me it call comes down to self love. When I cultivate that all the other stuff is easy.
Easy, build a healthy lifestyle as a matter of habit, and develop a growth mindset.
That’s going to be a foundation you can develop your whole life on.
Proper diet/nutrition and mental health
Find the thing that makes you most uncomfortable and learn to be comfortable with it.
In my 20’s you were trying many different things. In my 30’s I needed to learn to be happy with myself. Doing what was most important to me came naturally. Acknowledging it, and trusting my instincts, were the hard parts. Being honest and accepting of myself, for once in my life, was enlightening. I had achieved some perspective in life and acquired some wisdom. Using it well demanded more discipline and vision which came, eventually…
To me this is like asking, “What’s the most important food to eat?” Good nutrition requires a diversity of foods and a good life requires a diversity of “areas to work on.”
That said, there are some life areas that are foundational to others.
Health has got to be #1 in that “if you don’t have your health,” as they say, it is hard or maybe even impossible to do anything else and enjoy life (imagine the gravest scenarios). But most people, particularly those adults younger than 70, say, *do* have their *physical* health to a good enough degree that health doesn’t feel like a priority or huge constraint on their lives.
Mental health is a subcategory here and that is increasingly common to be tenuous in one’s early life. It’s also foundational in that if one is constantly struggling with anxiety, depression, self esteem, shyness, indecision, addiction, impulsivity, etc. it puts major constraints on one’s ability to have a good life.
Then money is also usually foundational because it facilitates being able to do many other things and to have a sense of security in the future, which plays into mental well being. It even plays into physical health because with money one can live in safer and less polluted areas, eat a higher quality diet, spend on exercise and wellness, etc.
So the trifecta of physical health, mental health, and wealth is not a bad starting point but it’s only a starting point.
It changes all the time in terms of what is my priority but its either:
1) Financial IQ
2) Health and physical fitness
3) Social life/relationships
Reading for exercising the mind.
Physical exercise for the body.
Planning and consistency for the future.