How the F do you make friends as an adult if you don’t drink?

38 comments

1. I haven’t had a problem with it, if anything it’s easier to filter out who I want to be friends with, because they’re the ones not pressuring me to drink. Find a place with a common interest and talk to randos until one of them seems cool, lather rinse repeat.

2. Befriend the people who don’t make drinking/alcohol their whole personality.

3. Try a sports league, nothing says you half to drink, you can go out to the bars and hangout, I’ve been known to just drink coke, be yourself and Don become someone your not just for friends.

4. Climbing gym.

5. Join a band if you play an instrument

   If you don’t play, see if they need a drummer or a bass player 😉

6. Do drugs.

7. Work, hobbies, travel – endless opportunities that don’t involve drinking

8. Gunclub, sports, hobbies, classes, drugs

9. Get comfortable looking like a fool. The most valuable and underrated thing in this world.

10. here are some ways i made friends without drinking as an adult. going out for walks you meet people, approaching a woman respectfully in a parking lot to offer to help with her many groceries, shopping at the boardgame store and being invited by the cashier to their personal out of work gaming group, joining a non fiction book club, meeting people at the bus stop, the recurrent bike race i have with an older woman who smokes me everytime somehow.

    i can go on but theres a pattern to it all. i literally just go outside of the house and youll end up meeting people.

11. Volunteer somewhere

12. AA meetings

13. Kids make friends by constant unplanned interaction. So you have to set yourself up for situations like that

14. Granted I’m only 26 but I’ve made friends through all of these after graduating and don’t drink with them except once in a blue moon:

    Sports leagues, joined as a random for sand volleyball

    Classes for dance and improv

    The gym

    Hobby meetups

    Bumble bff after wading through the homosexual men hitting on me

15. Find a hobby

16. I know, it sucks. And I’m not even an “alcoholic”, I just decided I didn’t like it anymore and people just can’t friggin deal with it. Like, hey Bobby, I don’t keep offering you swordfish when you’ve told me you don’t like it!!!

    I’d say just don’t mention it and get soda or something. Or say “I’m not drinking *tonight*” so they think it’s just a temporary conditional thing, then keep saying it.

    As for where? I don’t know, try something active like pickleball or something.

17. I play DnD. I was adopted by extroverted nerds.

18. I just listen to people and talk to them and try to help with various shit I’m up for ranging from fixing some random thing that takes 2 minutes to moving to heavy discussions, etc. Things just develop from there. Found friends at work, in games. I don’t go out, let alone go drinking and it hasn’t been a problem.

19. Even harder is having phenomenal sex while sober. When I’m high or drunk I would eat ass and clap random cheeks like a future Maury contestant. Sober me: “I’m not interested cause I might theoretically knock you up”

20. Sports, gym, educational classes, work, travel, sightseeing, drugs, group meets, online video games, social media, eating inside at fast food places, volunteer animal shelters, dog/cat meetups, fishing trips, community service, yard selling, gardening, Uber/Lyft driver, hobby shops/meetups, volunteering at shelters, dancing classes, hiking, live action theater, museums, going on city tours, walking through your city/town just because

21. The tough thing about making friends once you’re an adult is that you actually have to have interests and provide value to other people’s lives. Throughout school all you really have to do is show up.

22. Play d&d.

23. In my area, the options are basically bars or churches. So I have no friends.

24. Hobbies! Get out there. You don’t even have to be good at the hobby, I’ve noticed that consistency works every time. You show up lots people will take note and wanna get to know you

25. Everyone always saying hobbies is getting old honestly. Just do a throwback, if you see another dude just ask him if you can play too. Or just linger around until he says you can have a turn if you want. It used to work back in the day, we’re still just dudes!

26. Martial arts

27. We have two sober buddies in my group, they go to bars and shit with us and everything they just drink coke or Arizona teas. U can make friends without drinking at places where people drink.

    It’s hard making friends regardless when youre older im not gonna bs you. Def look at some hobbies you’re interested in

28. Pick up a hobby that involves other people.

29. At that point, you are either relying on work or common interests. Once you get the introductions out of the way, it’s pretty easy. It’s just introductions are insanely hard.

30. I do drink and still have no friends so it ain’t that

31. Get a hobby you can share with other people

32. Find your friendly local neighborhood Mormons.

    Pros: They don’t typically drink and won’t pressure you into drinking

    Cons: Will invite you to church

    Source: Am Mormon

    ​

    In all seriousness, it’s all about the hobbies for me. I do competitive shooting and powerlifting and have found some friends that way.

33. Drug-infused orgies

34. Join meetup. Anything you like doing has a meetup. These people will have a common interest and often do not have alcohol involved. Though, there are some that do, of course. I travel for work so I usually go to meetups in the area to make friends.

35. Go to church, volunteer, and/or get involved with a social hobby

36. Asking this question as a recovering alcoholic is depressing as fuck. Go to a bar but don’t drink? That’s the best we got? lol

37. Church, sport, online video games, hobby, gym, staying in contact or re-connecting with friends from the past. Showing up to the events you get invited too. Being open to talking to other adults in the room than just your friends you already have. Being passionate about your career so you feel connected with coworkers or fellow business operators. Not being an ass or judgmental. Having an open disposition, working on yourself mentally.

38. ah, right, bars are pretty much the only place for social hangouts as an adult. at least in western nations.

    in my country it’s mostly traditional cafés, and even then it’s still super hard. the only real place where you can interact with people on a somewhat regular basis to even have a chance to become friends is work. but the problem is that’s a place where everyone hates eachother XD.

    honestly, i gave up making new friends once i became an adult. got 2 or 3 i made in my teens, and that’s enough for me