I’m gonna make this short because I don’t have the energy to type out everything that happened last night.
Long story short:
My gf(24) and I(24) have been together over a year.
Our relationship hit road bumps early on because she kept in frequent contact with an old flame.
After awhile I expressed how it made me uncomfortable they talked so frequently. She told me I was her priority and she would stop
Months go by. It happens again. Causes a major argument. Once again, she claims she’s done and I won’t have to worry about it again.
Last night. She’s acting really strange and dodgy. She’s hiding her Snapchat. I asked if there was anyone on there that she thinks would make me uncomfortable because she’s acting so strange and defensive.
She says “no. No. Why are you accusing me? You need to trust me”
I say so you’re not gonna tell me who it is?
“No because you need to trust me.”
Guess what. It was him. She slipped up. Tells me he reached out to her and they had been chatting all day.
I just stood there and had gone numb. The person I love the most lied to my face over and over and then lectures me on trust.
I’m just tired. I told her if she can’t be in a relationship with me without him becoming something she needs to be secretive about, then I can’t go forward like that.
Fast forward to today. She’s remorseful. Says she feels sick with shame.
What do I do
2 comments
is this something you’d really want to deal with in a relationship? if she were to actually cut him off, will you be able to rebuild that trust with her? how does she plan to cut him off? block and unfollow? or just not reply? how does she plan to earn your trust back? bc at this point, it would be understandable to not be able to solely trust her word. you can explain that to her. i don’t think i would continue on with this relationship but if you can make it work then i applaud you. communication is key so take a moment to evaluate the relationship
your behavior was really beta and it would really make a woman just not fall for you. if i was me i wouldn’t pay no mind to her and continue to break her in the bedroom so she can figure out real quick who daddy is and before you know it that ex becomes history. your mentality is “shes not yours, its just your turn bro” and when you see consistency then you will know. so i dated a hot russian girl who has a lot of guy friends because she hates women and women complain and etc so i understand why she has 99% all guy friends. am i worried? no because these guys are probably friendzoned and i was breaking her in bed, in my car, i was having my way so i know through these experiences shes going to know who daddy is and whos shes going to get attached to. just tell her this one that you want to keep it casual/fwb and thats it. and move on to the next girl. its a bit late to recover from this. sometimes when you show beta behavior a girl would lose interest/respect for you little by little. its normal. i’ve never done the things you did and they just fall for me first. don’t ever chase a woman, even if she wants you to chase her. if a woman really likes you, she will chase u instead. There’s a lot for you to learn from reading your post. I can recommend some YouTubers to watch, and I will say the more videos you watch, the more you will know what to do in XYZ situation 1—anthonyspade reactions 2. Manosphere highlights daily 3. Black Filipino TV 4. Legion of men 5. living a life of abundance. 6. casual bachelor 7. Fbe capital 8. Modern life dating 9. ReplicantPhish 10. Taylor the fiend 11. mtr (mediocre tutorials and reviews)
12. man guide 14. The celebrity junk 15. Oshay duke Jacksn 16. MJ get right 17. man reacts 18. better bachelor 19. darius m 20. coach greg adams
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The funniest YouTuber here is living a life of abundance, so have your popcorn ready. If you want to go deep, check out MJ Get Right and Anthonyspade reaction videos from 1-2 years ago, and everyone else brings a unique flavor to teaching you about the dating scene with women. MJ has three videos with the word validate, after watching that i got laid on the same day. The only problem is, learning this stuff at 27yr instead of 18yr where i wish i knew it to have dated a lot more in my teens and early 20s. ;/
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In 6 months or less, your brain will generate all the answers you are looking for once you have enough information from all the videos you watched of every possible dating situation you saw.
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If you drive, then try to play a few videos to listen to. You’ll learn a lot faster. Get a second phone like I did if you need to separate GPS from what you are playing. and remember you can start of by just watching videos with thumbnails and titles related to your x situation so you solve your issues faster instead of watching videos in any order.
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so once again, the more videos you watch the more you will know *what to do* and *how to act* in xyz situation. that does also include looking through some of the older videos from years ago. you may find gold in there.