I moved to a new city around 6 months ago. I didnt know anyone here but I met someone who has been helping me a lot throughout my stay. This friendship turned into ”dating” only 6 weeks ago.
Long story short, I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday and this man recognized the dog that I was walking and his heart dropped to his ass. He asked if this dog belongs to so and so, which was extremely strange since he doesnt even live in the same country as me atm. The dog belongs to the girls grandmother who lives right next to me so I take it on walks every now and then. I thought that he’s some how related to this old lady but he explained that he used to talk to her grand daughter (they met randomly on a holiday trip, the world is extremely small to say the least😂) and things ended on bad terms between the two. She ended up being the same exact woman that I’m currently talking to….
I’ve been feeling like shit since that call lol, am I overreacting if I just call things off before it gets serious. I know that my bullshit mentality would affect a lot throughout the way.
For some reason it just doesnt feel right to be with someone who has been with people that I know. It really affects my self-esteem and makes me feel insecure.
My question is how can I tackle this while being as respectful as possible? Should I even mention my reasoning? I feel like it’d sound like I’m referring to her as ”another man’s leftovers” which is insane and extremely demeaning.
6 comments
Dude WTF? This is not childish its INSANE.
She…she literally only talked to a friend of yours, and you are ‘torn apart’?
Just so I am clear on the extent of her betrayal and lack of character.
The healthy option would be to look into why, as you so eloquently put it, you view this woman you used to be attracted to as ‘leftovers’ now. That’s not an acceptable way to view a woman with a normal past. If it’s that simple, there’s no way to come out of this without being an asshole.
Change the gross mindset. If not this girl, every other one you’ll date will have a past romance/past fling. Either overcome this toxic view of women or settle for the fact you’ll always be having someone’s ‘leftovers.’
Break up with her, and go ahead and tell her exactly why. That way she’ll understand that it’s not because of anything wrong with her, but rather because you’re a weirdo.
If you want to break up, then just break up, there are no magic words
Are you insane?