I (26F) posted about the fight I had with my husband (27M) for Mother’s Day… he said he needed time and space.. maybe I’m wrong to think he has to speak to me at some point to some degree given we have kids, but I feel like he’s just ignoring me. He hugged our 2YO, said hello to her, then ignored us all for the entirety of the evening. Kids crying and all he just sat on the couch and watched or scrolled on his phone and then jumped on his game and ignored everything.
I understand he’s upset with me, but not helping me with the kids is taking space? Maybe I don’t have a leg to stand on and if that’s the case someone please tell me so. I’m not asking him to pretend nothing happened, but really? Not helping with our kids?
TLDR; husbands ignoring me completely after a fight he said he needed space to recover from, but I didn’t think that meant not helping with our kids.
6 comments
nah I mean it’s one thing to not talk to you about the fight. But if he’s just completely checking out then it’s kind of bullshit IMO. Tell him directly to take care of his kids. Don’t bring up the fight.
Wow OP he’s a jerk flat out. Fine if he needs space from you but that doesn’t excuse parental duties. You and especially him need couples counseling asap. That isn’t normal behavior, that is a grown ass adult acting like a teenager. That is what teenagers do. OP you need to tell him he can have space with you but that doesn’t help with your relationship but he can’t ignore his role as a father!
Do you and your husband fight a lot? This is toxic behavior. He’s acting like your the main parent and he’s just a roommate with benefits off you. Do you both work or is he the main provider ? Also he doesn’t even respect you on Mother’s Day at the very least, terrible. I’m upset reading and typing this.
What a jerk! He’s so wrong for ignoring the kids! I sometimes want to ignore my husband for attention, but I know not to let my emotions cross over to my kids and ignore them too! No way! He’s very immature! I’m sorry OP! I hope your guy’s situation will get better soon! Please let him know that whatever happens between you two, is between you too only! It’s not fair to the kids, they did nothing wrong and should not be ignored.
You are married, and by extension he needs to be your rock and you his. Instead of silent treatment talk to him. Apologize for blowing up, explain your solitude in grieving for a baby, and a fact he didn’t put effort into mother’s day. If that is something you hold dear then he should step up even if that isn’t his love language. And even you two are on rocky grounds doesn’t mean he can show kids and stop helping
“Look you don’t have to talk to me right now if you don’t want to but you don’t get to check out of parenting your children. Also more than a day of silent treatment is really not helping the situation”
Coming from a man, this is unacceptable. You can be mad at your spouse all you want. But you don’t neglect the kids.
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They did nothing wrong. He needs to snap out of it.