I know everyone’s bodies are different but I feel like guys are stretchier.
Context, I’m a smallish female and I can do one finger easily, can’t do two. Sometimes can use a small dildo. I think it’s a hot idea but it always hurts going in more than an inch or two with a toy, so a normal sized penis is too much and even with lube and a teeny toy, I’ve bled (when alone) and it hurts for a few days.
Guy I’ve been seeing agreed to let me put a finger in him, and then a dildo to see if it hurts. He said it didn’t hurt but he wasn’t a huge fan. A lot of my gay guy friends, even tops, said that they can put toys/penises in pretty easily. I use lube, I warm up, do everything, but it just won’t go in deeper. Is it just me or are guys just stretcher down there? Am I just not built for it? Are anal adventures just not for me?
Edit: please no more DMs :/
10 comments
Try using like 10x more lube than you have been
Way more lube, try a different angle
Maybe you’re not relaxing enough down there
It’s physically not the same. Just as women are typically shorter in stature and have different hip/ shoulder ratio and different typical body fat percentage, female bodies have different strength in the connective tissue, muscle rings, different amount of tone in the anal part of the pelvic floor.
That’s before the stress of childbearing, which both hormonally and physically stresses the pelvic floor.
Women’s bodies are at baseline higher risk of permanent injury as compared to men, after engaging in anal sex.
https://www.winniepalmerhospital.com/content-hub/anal-sex-what-women-need-to-know
I’m a bi male who’s introduced anal to a few women over the years and I’m a bottom when I’m with men.
The important things to remember about anal are:
1. Lots of lube
2. Lots of patience, don’t rush things. Like you mentioned, you’ve done 1 finger, make sure to leave that finger in until you’re 100% comfortable with it. .
3. Relax your anus completely. When getting started, the body’s natural reaction to to clench. Get comfortable enough to where you can relax and overcome the desire to clench.
4. Be in a pretty high state of arousal. Get yourself really turned on before trying anything in your rectum. If your mind is in the right place, then your body will be more willing to go along with you.
5. And lastly, this is related to number 4, is this something that you really want or are you just doing it for someone else? There are many different feelings involved with anal play, from physical (the feeling of being penetrated, stretched, fullness, like you have to go to the bathroom) to psychological (doing something many see as taboo, wanting to experiment, etc). If you really want it, following the steps above can help you achieve it. If you’re really not that into it, then even doing the above steps will never make it feel good.
Bottom line (pun intended) if you get to a point where you want it and enjoy it, then great! If you get to a point where you have done more anal play and you don’t like it, then that’s great too. Now you know
To answer your first question, I don’t think guys are able to stretch easier than women, I think it’s that the guys that try it, usually really want it.
Good luck!
I have read that women’s are different than men’s, I have also seen porn of women taking huge toys in the butt. You could try very small toys or try a glove on your finger, try this every three days or sooner. Once your comfortable with the size, maybe after 3 weeks try another bigger toy or more fingers. Sometimes fingers are harder to take than a similar sized toy
If it hurts and your bleeding, it is obviously not pleasurable for you. Maybe take full-on penis penetration anal off the menu? Perhaps an inch is all you need?
Don’t injure yourself for his pleasure.
I have no idea but I would assume yes because their genitals are outside their bodies while are are inside? I might be wrong but that’s my thought.
Don’t give up…I enjoyed it very much. Get a plug set that has different sizes. Use lots of lube. I love using a clit vibrator while having anal. Instead of clenching, you have to push, like you are pooping while inserting anything.
the problem most have with anal is rushing into things you should start small buy a butt plug set and start with the smallest one for a week and then build up just having it in there and having it in while having piv and work up from there and make sure to use lots of lube its going to take time but youll get there dont even think about a dick until after the plug training is done!