Why is it every female my age goes for the complete asshole.
Hi I’m a 19 year old male and I try meeting people I try online dating but person I meet is all into the older men or complete assholes, I try to by them everything I try to be the shoulder to cry on I try to be that person that’ll stick up for them but the second I try to ask for a kiss or to cuddle with nothing else attached. I’m 5’6″ 256lbs but still have muscle I try to talk to people and do what I’ve been told by all my female friends they like back in high school but I’m so lost can someone help me please?
4 comments
You don’t sound like someone who takes care of themselves. So that’s why they’re not attracted to you.
What exactly do you want help with?
You seem to say that girls your age are generally immature. Well, since you have the same age, chances are you’re also as immature, in different ways.
The same way you’d hope for a more mature girl who doesn’t “go for assholes”, they also seek more mature guys, and that might partially explain why some of them go for older guys.
One step towards maturity is to stop for a second and think: “If trying to date is so stressful, why am I doing it?”
Just so you know, sure a nice relationship and good intimate time are pleasurable to most, but it’s not like any partnership will lead to a nice time. So why going through all that stress to then have something you don’t even know if it’ll make sense or not?
For most of us, me included in my early 20s, this stress for simply pressure coming from peers: everyone was stressing to be in a relationship, so everyone else felt like it was the only way
Then you grow up, you mature, and you realise that the best relationship is the one that didn’t come from all that dating stress
Yeah dude, you have to become an attractive person to attract the right people into your life. Right now you’re in the friend zone. Girls like a guy that’s a little bit of a risk, taker or a challenge. Not necessarily an asshole. But nice guy sometimes see, overly confident guys who are a little aloof or risky as assholes. You got to distinguish the two.
I did this exercise with a coach once, where I wrote down like 40 things I would want in my ideal partner. I thought it was going to be a vision board type of thing where I looked at it over and over again, but he said, now, circle the top ten. And I did. And then he said now….become that person. You need to become what you want to attract. The end.