Is it better off being single? Do you get to fully focus on yourself? Have any kinds of fun you want to?

29 comments

  1. I didn’t have to check in with anyone else about where I was going. That was a little bit of an upside.

  3. Peak in a relationship beats peak single, but the lowest parts of singleness are better than the lowest points of being in a relationship.

    There’s no inherently “better” or “worse” in relationship versus single because it depends on the quality of your relationships and how well you live your life

  5. You have the ability to figure out who you really are. When you’re in a relationship (especially living together) you don’t really have any individuality, everything you do she does and vice versa. Your personality is meshed in with hers and it’s like you’re the same person, which can cause resentment in some people. I wouldn’t trade the 7 year relationship I had for anything, but at the same time it really didn’t allow me to grow as a person. Not blaming her, it was on me

  6. >Is it better off being single?

    Yes!

    >Do you get to fully focus on yourself?

    Yes!!

    >Have any kinds of fun you want to?

    Yes!!!

  7. Freedom to focus on your career, including things like moving for work or working a job that requires a ton of overtime or weird hours

  8. 29 and Engaged now, but intentionally stayed single for a little over two years after a broke off engagement in my mid 20s which was the first time since I was 16 that I was single more than a few months.

    When I was single I really enjoyed and embraced it. I enjoyed that independence, learning self-reliance and living my life on my own schedule. I was t beholden to obligations to a partner and spent life enjoying my passions and bettering myself. I kind of embraced the “fun divorced uncle” role of my friend groups as most of my friends were in relationships or married. So a lot of my friends lived vicariously through me or I was the fun third wheel and loved it.

    I’ve also never been one into the hookup game, but there was a few one-off scenarios where opportunities for a short term connection or fun presented itself and that was kind of a fun rush to experience from time to time.

    But, being in a happy, healthy relationship with my fiancé now, who is literally my best friend I’ve ever had, I’d never trade it for that life again. Having that fulfillment of waking up next to her every morning, enjoying my time with her, and having fun with the passions we both share together is something I don’t want to live without. Getting laid daily with a partner with matching libido and knowing very well what we each like is also far better than the best hookup I’d ever have.

  9. Not the specific age range, but as a single 34yo man, it’s just, peace. I’m not obligated to anyone. I don’t have to always take someone else into consideration. I can focus all my efforts into me and what I want to build towards in my own life rather than making sure it’s in line with someone else too. I’m actively putting work into MY goals and doing things how I see fit.

    Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely intend to find my forever partner and marry my best friend. I want that partnership and commitment more than anything else. I’m at a point in my life I just can’t stomach the idea of being attached and investing in someone else. Right now it’s just me, my dog, my cat, and my own life. Pure contentment.

  10. If I neglect the sheer pain of being lonely, celebrating my acheivements alone, one ray of peace I find is that I don’t have to think about another person while making decisions! So yeah, that’s something!

  12. You’re young. YOU’RE YOUNG. Don’t worry about it. Enjoy it.

    That said, if you have the choice of going out with a bunch of people, one or two may be your friend the rest are randoms, and sitting at home smoking weed, go out. Stay off the weed.

  14. I spent those ages constantly in relationships. This is something I HIGHLY regret. No time for myself. No freedom. Nothing for me. All for them.

  15. The pros are too numerous to list, but here are a few of my personal best pros.

    1. You can sleep anywhere left, right, center of the bed, couch, recliner anywhere.
    2. You do not have to reach a consensus on what to eat.
    3. Many of your bill’s food, auto insurance, car payments, cell phone are half other bills utilities are considerably lower.
    4. If you want to decorate your house in Bugs Bunny cartoon posters, no one will stop you, you decorate as you want.
    5. The only one you have to make happy is you.
    6. 100% of your time is your time.
    7. You are not on the verge of being a murder victim every 28 days.
    8. Ladies’ undergarments hanging all over the bathroom.
    9. No ex or in-law drama.
    10. Peace and quiet.

    These are just the first 10 that came to mind, but I could go on all night.

  16. Freedom to explore whatever you want. It’s a good time to explore. I would actually extend it to at least 30.

    But make time and space to fall in love. It’s also worthwhile. However, you’ll bring a lot more to the relationship if you explore independently first.

  17. Literally everything. That is all. I’ve been married for 15 years. I was single for a time in those years. Great memories

  18. More time to sort your life. Work on your career and your self. Best time to leave your competition behind and have a good 30s.

    This is not that much applicable if you are intentionally single. Because if you are single by choice then it means that you already have the right values and mindet to be successful by working hard on your career which are the most attractive for a high value girl.

    But if you cant get any girls…then dont worry , this is your chance. You have your 20s to build yourself up. Be the best you and set yourself for a great 30s.

  19. I didn’t intentionally stay single to focus on my career, but it worked out pretty well.

    A healthy relationship requires a healthy commitment of time.

  21. Less drama stress and potentially trauma from betrayal. I’m 26 I was planning to get married but after I got out of the relationship I’m glad we didn’t because we were not a good fit together. It’s better to work on yourself and build your career and enjoy friends than just get sucked into something right away.

  22. Build so many things.

    Career

    Wealth

    Skills

    Experiences ( travel, hobbie, social, sporting)

    So many things if you don’t obsess about pussy.

  23. more freetime to yourself

    spending money on yourself only

    no makeup filling up the bathroom counter

    no crazy amount of hair in shower drain

    closet isnt filled with clothes that are worn once a month

    if you want to sleep in instead of taking someone out on a date, YOU CAN!

  25. Personally bing single is where I truly learned about who I am as a person. I’ve also mellowed out my desire for a relationship because I’ve realized I still personally have a long way to go before I’m ready to truly give someone my all. More so in a “I really need to set a good foundation for a financially stable future” type of way. If someone comes along for the ride I’ll be happy but in the meantime I don’t have to answer to anyone. That’s the biggest benefit. I can go wherever I want. I can speak to whoever I want to speak to. If I want to sleep with more than one partner I can. I don’t have to worry about planning dates. My eating out bills are drastically reduced lol.

  27. well, if you want to have sex, you kinda have to be in a relationship if you are in normie territory.

    otherwise, if you are handsome and not too autistic – do whatever the f you want, women will like you anyway.

    I fall somewhere in between, I used to have a few one night stands, even tho I am a turbo autist – currently I am just trying to make & invest money so I am wealthier than average, which makes things obviously easier.

    also, dont marry, it is kinda a scam – only if you have a “marriage contract” – prenup is what you guys probably call it.

  28. Being single is great I don’t like arguing over stupid things which often happens in relationships, I don’t have to buy stuff or make plans for anyone’s birthday/anniversary/etc, I don’t owe anyone an explanation for what I do, I don’t have to stress over someone else, I don’t have to alienate my friends like most couples do at one point or another to varying degrees. I could go on.

    I don’t hate being in a relationship and I wouldn’t be opposed to it I’m just not looking for one and don’t need it. Which I think most people should have that attitude towards romantic relationships anyways.

  29. Im 37 I spent ages 17-36 in long term relationships, if I could go back I would spend my 20s being single and grinding traveling and doing everything I love. In my mind those years are the best years to learn yourself and grow yourself as an individual. I also feel like as a Man you become more valuable to women in your 30s after you have learned yourself. You also have a wide range of women to choose from once you enter your 30s vs in your early 20s.

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