Im M27 and struggle with getting cold feet when theres a women showing clear interest in me, like I dont know how to proceed. Never made a move on a women myself, I just freeze up or overthink.
I kinda blame beeing in a relationship for most of my life and never having to activly approach a girl. Feel like everyone got more confidence than me at my age.
4 comments
You will not like the answer but the only way is:
make a move -> fail
make a move -> fail
make a move -> succeed
make a move -> fail
make a move -> succeed
make a move -> succeed
….
do or do not, there is no try
What do you mean by making a move? Like, asking a woman out on a date, or going for a kiss (or similar) once you’re already on the date?
I got over my anxiety when a guy made a move on my crush right in front of my eyes before I was able to make a move. Ever since then I always know somebody else will ask my crush before I do it, and that motivated me to make the first move as soon as possible from now on.
If you are pretty sure she’s interested, then just assume she is and act like it.
So when you’re talking to someone who’s interested in you, you don’t say “Will you go out on a date with me?” You didn’t do that when you were in a relationship right? You didn’t ask her on dates.
When you were in a relationship, you probably said something like this “Hey, lets go to Sardi’s and grab some dinner and chat. When are you available?”
It’s more confident language and it assumes she’s attracted to you already.
It’s not 100% that this will work. She could still slap you down…especially if you just met her. But if you think she is “showing clear interest in me” then go ahead and ask her like you’re already going out.