How did you handle money in a relationship where your partner made more? How did you feel about contributing the amount you did?

8 comments

1. There was nothing to handle, he was happy providing what he did and I was happy providing what I did

2. We agreed on a fixed percentage of our income to go into a joint account. That joint account is considered to be equally shared, and would be split 50/50 if we separated. We itemized everything that’s acceptable to use that joint account to pay for. If we invest into anything using the joint account, we share the profits/loss from that. Anything we invest into in our own time is our own.

   I like the percentages because even as the higher-earning part of the couple, if I were to get laid off or otherwise unavailable to work, my expected contributions drop to 0% along with my income. If I want to take a lower paying and lower stress job one day, having to contribute X set amount won’t be a barrier — contributions go down with income.

   It feels equitable to me. 🙂

3. When we were dating and engaged, our money was separated and we just contributed equally to bills. Now that we’re married we have a joint account where all of our money is combined. It doesn’t matter to us who makes more, it’s all Our income.

4. My husband makes more than I do. But I have benefits and retirement matching and he has none so it’s a bit more even when you take all of that into account, but he still makes more. We have separate finances. We split bills evenly. Everything is in my name so I pay everything and then he gives me half. He covers groceries, I cover dining out. I am very happy with our arrangement. Financial independence is very important to my sense of psychological safety.

5. I haven’t been in one but I don’t think it’s an issue, each one contributes the amount he can.
   This goes both ways, I also don’t mind contributing more if I make more.

6. It is our money and thats just what it is to it. When I was younger I felt bad but I contribute other things than just money and I didn’t exactly choose disability

7. My husband makes about double my salary. Everything goes into 1 account. We also have 1 savings. It’s not that complicated. We are married so what’s his is mine and what’s mine is his.

8. We just talk about it and agree on what we think is fair.