I’m a 30 year old male and I love my wife and I find her very sexy. Idk if I went through something in my past and subconsciously it comes out with this desire. Idk. But for whatever reason, I want to see one guy have sex with my wife. (Not have her sleep around with everyone, just have like one friend with benefits) and I don’t want him to know that I know. For some reason, the fact that he thinks she is hiding it turns me on more.
I have spoken with my wife about this. She is open to the fantasy during sex but refuses to do it in real life. Obviously, I am not pressuring her in any way. But inside I have this deep desire to see it happen.
I know something is wrong with me. Are there any psychologists out there that can help me figure out the why? Maybe I need to go see one…
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This is a common kink. It’s been shown that when a man believes his partner has been with another man, he ejaculates harder and more. It’s thought this is a sperm competition thing.
There’s nothing wrong with you. Perfectly common fantasy and normal to imagine/enjoy our partner’s sexuality in different settings. No need for shame or embarrassment about it–unless that’s part of the fun of course! Go forth and enjoy….
I cant answer your question but i can tell you you arent alone. Ive been the same ( now 62) since hs. Shared most of the girls i was ever with. Maybe om worse than you ( or better ) my wife “ slept around” to use your term w a bunch of guys and i couldnt keep my hands off of her. Everything about it and her of course turns me on.
Nothing wrong with fantasizing. Just don’t let the obsession wreck what you have.
It’s great to incorporate the fantasy into your playtime if you’re wife is into that but actually making happen could have unexpected consequences.
DP with toys , role playing, even cock sleeves can enhance the fun.
I’ve been there, done that, in a MFM threesome with my SO. I definitely was always wanting to be involved with it and it be something we did together, not just me watching, although obviously I did for a minute or two if I went to get a drink, use the bathroom, or just take a break for a minute, but yeah it was fun and I definitely enjoyed it.
It’s not my thing at all (I’m a ‘do it myself’ kind of guy), but I absolutely get the appeal for some guys. It breaks down to 3 thing IMO.
1. If you are absolutely crazy about a woman, the thought of her experiencing sexual ecstasy is extremely satisfying. Everyone is aware that there are guys out there made to fuck and that in terms of the bedroom, you can’t compete.
2. A woman who is desirable to multiple other men triggers that lizard brain of ours. We instinctively want to be with desirable women.
3. A woman who craves being manhandled by a powerful man is the ultimate in femininity. This feminine energy is intoxicating.
I totally get all of this, but I went the other way. I got on TRT. I lift weights and do cardio. We use cock sleeves from time to time. I might be 48, but I smash my wife like a 20 YO on a pretty routine basis. Women want to be pounded by a powerful man who doesn’t get winded after 5 minutes of sex.
If any guy is considering going down the route of finding a bull to smash their wife, take some time and try to become that guy first. Adding a 3rd adds in an insane amount of emotional chaos. It might work out, but disaster is pretty common.
🙋🏻♂️ I share the kink. Sort of. And I don’t think anything is “wrong” with me. I don’t want to full on watch my wife fuck another guy but I do love watching her turn on other men. And women. And dogs. And whoever. There’s a lot I could entertain when it comes to her with another man. I’ve offered to get her a happy ending massage from a male masseuse while I watched. But your wife’s thoughts aren’t strange. She has an emotional connection with you that makes the idea not a turn on. Because she loves you. BUT that doesn’t mean the fantasy can’t be teased. Played with. To give you both a turn on that fires up your own bedroom. That’s what my wife and I do. We take our fantasies, that most likely will always stay a fantasy, and see if they can be flirted with to get the turn on. Walking the line of reality and fantasy is sometimes all you need 👍
since nobody else has said it, I have to. liking to watch your wife. get fucked is absolutely fine if she’s into it, but you absolutely cannot spy on someone that does not know you’re there. That is a massive consent violation. There are so many men who would be into being a Bulll for your wife. You’ll just have to be satisfied with roleplay for the “hiding it” part.
I’m wit ya,except I want to watch!!
Cuckolding is real.. its fetish; thing you fantasize
You’re a cuck my dude, that’s tough
Projection. You want to have sex with a man but are too repressed to admit it.
Good post. Really good comments…
Yeah I can’t tell you, I’d be creeped out and weirded out to share my girlfriend or wife
It’s just fun. Stop worrying
Because you’re a cuck
It’s called cuckolding. Other comments are suggesting you only “one side of the story” though where it’s “just a kink”. Google it. And if your wife isn’t interested in participating, please, stop pushing her, it can negatively affect her psychological (and not only psychological) health. Thing like that definitely should’ve been discussed prior to marriage..
It’s hot to know your partner is desirable to other people.
I feel like you know. Given you mentioned you went through something
Because you’re a cuck
Perhaps you can propose a MFM then it would be you watching them go at it and participate later or during breaks and such.
Keep in mind that while most people *think* they want this, it actually leads to regret the next day more often than not.
Just scroll the sub for evidence.
Could be a number of things.
You think your wife is hot and other men wanting her is a pride/ego thing. Like having a nice car or something. Letting some dude think he is getting one over on you when you wanted it is somehow a dominance thing for you over the dude.
You are at least somewhat interested in men yourself. Your wife is presumably the closest person to you. Using her as a proxy or surrogate for you getting fucked by these men. You are not ready to take the step of getting fucked and sucking off dudes so you have your avatar do it for you. When I was in my early 20’s I banged a chick in her 30’s I worked with whose husband let her “cheat”. I was into it until she told me after a few times that when she got home he would not let her shower and then he ate her out and stuff. She said he loved it but it creeped me out when I found out.
You get off on the control over your wife and for some reason this is manifested by getting her to fuck other men at your request.
As a kinky poly non-cuck, I kinda envy cucks tbh lol…jealousy is a difficult beast to tame and “compersion” while helpful doesn’t always do the trick.
Because you’re a cuck.