30m single and unemployed for 5years, i have a bachelors in construction estimate. I completed my bachelors at age 25 cause I started late cause of indesicion and no ambition in life, i was so hesitant what i wanted at that time and i just chose that degree without any passion cause it pays great in the future if we have the right skills and experience, the job is miserable and working in construction is so hard as projects are not last long and i have to go to wherever the project go whether its a rural or remote area and have to sacrifice the whole life and mental sanity too cause the job is too stressful.
I had a job training at age 25 in a reputed company at age 25 but again I quitted the training again due to bullshitting my self and givin excuses my self that im not good at etc, i just came back and started living with my parents without any idea of future or what should i do, then just years went by and i tried so many times to get bact to a job as an estimator but due to my age and having no any experiences I couldnt get any job, and covid happend and economy down and most construction projects halted or stopped and simply they stopped recruite. It made me stay with my parents until age 30,
i never had any social life or gf or any kind a life like others cause i had no money like people my age to date or have fun, from age 25-30 i stayed at my room isolated and always worrying about wht im gonna do with my life. I had no any other qualifications to get any other job also. This made me living with my parents so guilty.
Im recently getting opportunity to join a migrating office as a consultant and im gonna get that job, its in a big city so i have to move out from home. But my biggest worry us taking a job i have no qualifications for its future, i mean have no any qualifications to get back another job as i have no releavnt degree or past experiences, just i can do this job for this moment but im scared about my future as this is not a career, im not disrespecting this job and im grateful for it but im shit scared about changing career paths, and starting over, the people who I started my estimator degree with now have awesome careers with 5+ years experiences.
Its only me I couldn’t create career out of that degree, and to tell you the current job has less reputation than the estimator job, and cause im single i have that disadvantage too when finding a gf,
I regret all the excuses and bullshits i told myself avoiding ng the growth in estimator career, and i feel my ego hurt too when doing a lesser job after dropping out of a reputed well paying (furure) career, but tbh there are no recruiting vacancies either for that estimator career due to covid and bad economy
I feel embarrassed and ashamed and I know friends would be happy to hear im doing less than them and mediocre friends would be happy that im same as them. My mom is kind a sad too but she is the only person who went all through this hell with me, i feel sad cause I couldn’t made her proud and i know she feel embarrassed to say her son doing an normal job now.
What is the best advice yall can give me by experience?
3 comments
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It feels like your parents enabled you to do nothing for 5 years. You need to do what you can to make up for that lost time if it’s bothering you that much instead of just feeling sorry for yourself. Workout, get certifications, meet people in industry.
You spent a lot of time making up excuses and not doing anything.
When you move to the big city, make it an absolute priority to pay for therapy to understand the cause of this behaviour and what you can do to change it.
My only advice is from now on: ACT don’t let life pass you by.