Every 1-2 years I feel like I drift away from another friend. Either they move away and we slowly have less and less in common, or even if they stay in the area they get busy with their own lives and don’t initiate anything. I initiate text conversations with friends 90% of the time and I feel that if I were to stop then people would forget about me. This is what happened to a friend I had for 12 years and all of a sudden she just stopped texting for no reason and would only send one word or one sentence replies when I asked.
I am a very introverted person and I have a very hard time making friends, because it takes a lot for me to open up to someone because I have to be sure that they are a “quality” person that “deserve” to know about me and is worth investing time in. As a result I care deeply about the friends I do have and are very loyal to them and go out of my way to be there for them when they might need me. But I get nothing or very little in return.
I don’t know whether this is just me or whether I am the problem, but I’m starting to doubt whether investing my time, money and emotional energy into friends is worth it. I’m extremely lonely but I’m tired of feeling inadequate so I tell myself that I don’t care, but I long for meaningful connections beyond small talk or bitching about minor inconveniences. Anyone else feel the same way?
Sorry if this is the wrong subreddit to post this btw. Hope you are having an alright day/night.
3 comments
I feel you, 6 years ago I had maybe 15 very good friends, 3 years ago that number was half of that! Now its down to maybe 2 good fiends and 1 acquaintance. I’m a bit introvert as well, realized I need to get out of my confort zone before I end up friendless! None the less with only 2 friends i still feel lonely. I get along with people but like u said I kind of test people to see if there a good person and that I want to be really good friends with them. Sad to say most of the people I meet are decent people but don’t think I could be real friends with them besides work friends. For me it is really sad becuase as of know I feel that number going down again. Maybe 1 but the end of the year! That being said, I know you pain to well keep your head up and try to break your shell, take care!!
I feel exactly the same way. Somehow we just need to find friends who care as much as we do, but unfortunately the problem is that it seems to be nearly impossible to do
I feel the same type of way.