Basically my best friend of six years has barely been talking to me for the past year or so, and the few times I’ve brought it up in a polite and respectful manner, she brushes it off saying ‘you know I’m not that much of a texting person’ (This was the first time I brought this up over a year ago, and have tried calling since then, hasn’t worked) or ‘Its in your head there’s nothing like that’.
I know it’s time to accept the fact that this is going nowhere, but that’s so difficult? She was my go to person for the longest time and I was the same for her.
I wanna make a last ditch effort and call her to talk about this, but I really don’t know what to say.
11 comments
Yes. Honestly, it’s as simple as just stop trying to talk to them. Find a new friend. I wouldn’t even make a “last ditch effort” or anything like that.
Space… everybody needs space sometime, so give them it – let them know you are there when/if they need them and let them be. They’ll hit you up when they are ready.
Don’t initiate any conversation at all(text or call), see how long it takes her to reach out.
If she doesn’t, it’s a one sided friendship and you need to move on.
When I was a young man, a much older and wiser man than myself offered this piece of advice, “You’re going to find that the older you get, and as you go through life; people will come and go and move in and out of your life…….and that is okay. It’s apart of life.” Basically, people change and experience growth. People grow apart and change causes them to grow in distance. This is pretty normal. You can’t hang on to all who come into your life.
Relationships change and evolve, and so do people. The question is, are you still getting what you need out of this relationship? If not, it may be time to invest in other relationships.
I feel like all my friendships are such that I think of them way more than they think of me. They say they value me/care about me, but I know they have other friends that they probably like more. A part of me feels like they’d all be totally fine without me. I don’t deal with it per se. I’m going through a long depressive episode and I may not make it out, so I guess I may not have to deal with it for much longer.
The person I call my best friend doesn’t consider me his best friend (he has never outright said it, but he never had to) and I know he cares about me on some level, but I’m scared that he’s slipping away. We don’t see each other that often anymore, and he’s a bad texter so he barely replies to my texts (he does the same with our mutual friends). Whenever we do hang out, I always get the feeling that he’s only doing it to pacify me (thanks, anxiety). I have never confronted him about it and I probably never will.
Anyway, it’s easy for me to suggest that you call your friend and talk to her, but I know that actually doing it might be difficult. Just know that you have an Internet stranger who’s rooting for things to turn out good.
Yes I have.. Met my best friend in high school. Were like glued together, he was the brother I always wanted – we stayed in touch daily even when I moved overseas to another country for a couple of years.
But then, shortly after I moved back, he found a girl, got married, had kids….that’s when the slippery slope came..
Less calls, less visits, less texts, until one day…..totally ghosted, just because I have no family of my own…(found out the hard way)
Life just sucks sometimes..
I have a really good friend from highschool who’s become ever increasingly needy af
He’s tarnished all his other friendships and now is leaning heavily on me to be his outlet. I’m intentionally holding back and only giving him as much time as I am comfortable with
I imagine he feels our friendship is one-sided…
This might sound really bad. You may not be able to get rid of those filling but you can surely replace the person. There are lots of good people out there (and practical!).
Find a new friend, develope that relationship from scratch. Don’t talk about it to her. If she already knows then there’s no point. If she doesn’t know then she doesn’t care. If she cared she would have made some efforts.
Your already too far gone. Abandone ship and of they give a shit about you they will reach out. Many people don’t realize what they have until it’s gone.
And besides, life is short bro. You don’t have time for shit friends. I have homies that will bail me out of jail and help me move a fridge. But that’s because I put in the work to be a great friend also.
I have known this person for 16 years now, but before I move on. We’ve had a very close relationship for 9 years. Just like you, when good things happens I went to her & vice versa, when bad things happens I went to her & vice versa.
But she will never ever pick up my call. Ever. But she wanted to hang out with me and date with me. There’s one time when she picked up my call when it about hours from new year.
Then one day, I decided to ask her, I wanted it more. I wanted to commit. We knew each other so damn well like we were made for each other. Then I asked her, will she be the one for me. She did not answer me. She ghosted me for almost a year.
So I move on …