I’ll keep it short if possible. My girlfriend and I have been dating for a little over a year and we have not done much penetration. She has had a rough past and i’m her first boyfriend she’s attempted penetration with. She has expressed that she really wants to do it with me but it hurts too much once it gets past the tip. which is totally understandable and we stop right away. We try using fingers and she can deal with that for a couple minutes before it becomes uncomfortable for her generally. We have tried using lube, water and silicone, sex toys, latex vs non latex condoms, etc and nothing seems to help. her OBGYN recommended coconut oil for lube and we have not tried that yet. However, not that i’m discrediting him, but my side of the family knows him and he is a great guy and a supporting gynecologist, but he is not the best at his job. my girlfriend loves him though and is adamant he is right about everything. We have heard talk about vaginismus, endometriosis, pelvic floor physical therapy, etc. We are both on this account and would like any advise you all could give.
4 comments
>it hurts too much once it gets past the tip
If it feels like you’re “hitting a wall” I think this is a very typical symptom of pelvic floor dysfunction. She should get evaluated for that. The pelvic floor muscles don’t come “all the way down” and when they freak out, they close up around 1 inch inside. So I’d be asking my doctor about that and about pelvic floor therapy.
Let her ride you. Take time. Rub lots and lots her on top of you.
Pelvic floor physical therapy worked for my wife.
A pelvic floor therapist can do an internal examination to help diagnose the issue. I would highly recommend this if you’re not getting satisfactory results from the OB/GYN. You may need to be direct with the OB that this isn’t a simple lube issue and might like to get another opinion if they do not listen.