This was previously posted to another sub –
So context, I recently hung out with this guy I met from an app (I’m also a guy). We didn’t label it as a date (nor do I think it was a date). We just decided to meet at his place to talk about random stuff and drink.
He had previously mentioned he was going through depression and just a sad stage in his life due to different things that’s happening (when we were chatting on the app). Over the course of our hang, I asked bout why he’s depressed (I also asked for permission to talk about this). I reassured him he’s doing great, different perspectives (I try to be very careful as to not invalidate his feelings), and just general stuff aimed to make him feel better. At one point, he said this felt like a therapy session. At that point I realized this is something I do often with people I feel attracted to. During our hang, never did it cross my mind that things can turn sexual or anything (we did meet on a hookup app). I wasn’t thinking “do I want to date / hookup with this guy down the road?”. Though we did talk about sex, but it was in the context of me reassuring him from his past trauma. I guess the hang mostly resolved around him talking about his trauma and me asking questions about how it impacted him, and how they relate to his current state now, and trying to reassure him from that. I think at one point i was tearing up. Thinking now, I’m not attracted to him but think I could be in the future (if that makes sense).
He said he enjoyed our chat and that “I’m good” at the end.
Idk why I do this, but I can’t help it. I would never do this unless the person had mentioned things they’re struggling with etc. Like I wouldn’t ask “ru depressed or struggling with something”.