Advice on whether or not I (21F) should break up with my bf (21M)

I (21F) started seeing this guy Jared (21M). During the beginning stages of us hanging out/talking, we were both seeing other people. After a few weeks, we both decided to get serious and I stopped all connections with everyone who wasn’t him. He did not. He was still talking “innocently” with a female he had previously told me he liked (before we were dating). I told him I was uncomfortable with it after finding out that his #1 bf on snap was her (mind you it used to be me). He told me he would stop, but it ended up going on three months into our relationship. I finally told him I was fed up and broke up with him. He fought back for me and eventually we made up. He stopped talking to her and though we still fought about this issue sometimes, things between us got pretty serious.

Fast forward two years into our relationship, my lab partner in school, Scott, began to hit on me. I told him I had a bf and immediately told my bf what was going on. Jared ended up meeting Scott a few weeks later at a kickback and Scott stopped hitting on me. Everything was well until my birthday on Tuesday. My lab partners (this includes Scott) thought it would be fun to get drinks after class since we had just taken a hard exam and it was my birthday. I agreed and invited my bf to come along. He wasn’t thrilled that Scott was there, but I didn’t think it would be a big deal since it was a group setting and he was going to be there. He expressed to me that he was uncomfortable with him still and again, I told him I wouldn’t hang out with him alone (even though the only times I’ve ever hung out with Scott was while Jared was there), but it would be inevitable to not see him until the school year was over (because we share the same school friends and have lab).

As I was thinking about our situation, i realized we had gone through this before (with the girl I asked him to stop talking to). Except, when he told me he was uncomfortable with someone, I actually listened and he didn’t until I brought up ending our relationship. It really bothered me looking back that he expressed such disinterest in letting that girl go, and I finally realized that I was his second choice. He liked her before me, and kept her around during the first three months of our relationship and only chose to be with me after he realized he had no shot with her. I brought this up and he denied it by saying she was insignificant. It became apparent to me that the only reason they’re not together is because she had a type and he didn’t fit into her standards (she liked black guys and Jared is white). I can’t seem to get over this and I shared this with Jared. He says he loves me and thinks we’ve built something special and that we should just move on from it. My feelings for him have grown so strongly these past few years that i want to forget how our upbringing came about, but i can’t help feeling like i was the second choice this whole time. I truly believe he’s over her now, but i don’t want to look back and remember that I’m only here she didn’t want to be with him. It’s such an awful gut-wrenching feeling because i love him so much. I wish I would’ve been his first choice from the get-go, because he was mine. Don’t know if I’m being sensitive or if this is truly something to be heartbroken about. What do you think? Should I try to get over it and leave it in the past, or just let things go between Jared and I? Thank you for reading, any advice helps.