Men of reddit please help me out. Please. I have ordered 50 mg of viagra to ensure when I get there I stay there but I want to make sure I’m not psychologically out of it too. I’m a 26 healthy male and only need this for my first time with someone new.
So granted the viagra will ensure I have an iron rod, what can help me relax? Thinking about this new girl gives me anxiety butterflies even typing this. My sexual desire is there I really want to do her, like so bad, but I need my tool to come to work. Today with her I had semi erections that would go away soon as I start thinking too much about it, but soon as I left her… I was horny the whole ride home.
I know (think) my size is good, and I was really bringing her to orgasm with legit my middle finger alone I’m actually concerned about fitting my D in her. 2 fingers wouldn’t get in there. I just need help with these anxiety butterflies. Anything at all I can do or take?
Seriously Reddit I need help here, I’m an attractive guy you would think can take my pick with any woman I want, and I kinda can, and I truthfully really WANT to, yall have no idea how bad I want to, but I know my dick won’t cooperate. And it’s so immasculating when a girl wants to have sex and throw herself at me but I know my member won’t cooperate so I avoid the situation. I will be hard as a rock with someone I’ve slept with before, or if I masrerbate which I’ve cut down a lot the past month.
4 comments
Take a shot or two of liquor. A little buzz will get you out of your head and provides a little confidence boost.
The most important thing to do is to lower your expectations. I know this seems like “woo woo” nonsense advice, but it’s true.
Why do you have to have an eight-inch cock, that can last 2 hours, and ejaculate a gallon-sized cum shot? There’s no reason that you have to be a sex god.
Women love sex. It’s a fact.
And you can bet that if you’re in a relationship, she loves having sex with you, because of your intimate bond. She doesn’t really care how good (or bad) the sex is. She’s happy to be there with you.
I had the same problem when I was in college. I would think too much (size + performance anxiety) and my member didn’t want to work.
What helped me was focus on dirty talking.
Helped me get out of my head and be in the moment and focus on how sexy the girl I’m with is.
It does like an auto-hypnosis : when I say that she maked me rock hard, it really does.
Good luck !
You can’t *think* yourself to an erection. And viagra can only sometimes help you maintain it, not get hard in the first place.
Performance anxiety with a new partner is common. It doesn’t help just knowing that, but it is true. And hopefully if the girl you’re with is understanding, you can tell her (if you haven’t already) that this is something that happens sometimes only with new relationships. If she’s understanding and you go in communicating that expectation, it could be easier, because it removes some stress from you.
But that could be a hard conversation to have. The key, regardless, is to stop thinking about your penis. Again, you can’t think yourself to an erection. Focus on other stuff — giving her pleasure and making her moan (which might excite you too), talking dirty to each other, letting her touch *other places* but not directly on your penis.
If you’re really concerned about the intercourse itself, maybe try doing other stuff first? Get used to staying hard with her while she gives you a handjob or blowjob or something? If penetrative sex is the worry, and you find it goes away with partners you’re comfortable with, then do stuff with this new woman that will help you get comfortable with less pressure.
That’s just one possibility. Maybe there’s a different strategy that works for you. But the key is to get your head out of the place where you’re worried about your penis staying hard AND learning to get comfortable with this new person. I can’t tell you exactly what may work for the two of you, but any way to make less pressure on you at first could help.