My boyfriend is into feet which isn’t an issue on its own. But he is obsessed with mine to the point where it’s getting annoying and I have no interest in sex anymore.
First thing in the morning he’ll reach down and touch my feet. Then before he gets out of bed he’ll spend 3-5minutes kissing and sniffing them.
If I’m in a different room he’ll randomly yell to ask me if my socks are on. If so, he’ll come in and take them off then spend another 3ish minutes kissing and sniffing.
If he was doing this quietly maybe it wouldn’t be as annoying, but about 30 times a day I kid you not, he’ll just randomly come up to me and say “feet” or, “I wanna cum on your feet” or “please put your feet in my face” in a weird baby voice.
I can tell he’s at least somewhat aware of how excessive this is, because sometimes as he’s kissing them he’ll say sorry in that awkward voice or will just generally start to act awkward and “derpy” if that makes sense lol. That’s probably the thing that’s killing my sex drive most — he used to be very confident, smooth, and dominant when initiating sex or being flirty in general. But now, 75% of his sexual attention toward me is centered around my feet. It’s like he knows how weird it’s getting but can’t help it.
I’ve nicely told him before that I wish he’d pay more attention to other parts of my body too, which he complied with for a bit then slowly went back to the obsession. I’m just scared of him shutting down fully if I tell him that I hate the obsession. Part of me feels like I shouldn’t be complaining that he’s obsessed with me. What can I say to make him stop without kink shaming him?
TL;DR: my (26F) boyfriend’s (28M) obsession with my feet is making me lose attraction but I don’t want him to feel ashamed.
5 comments
Why would it have to be kink shaming? Just tell him he’s being obnoxious and he needs to knock it off
You’ve let this go too far. He’s not even objectifying you as a woman, he’s objectifying you as the lowliest body part there is. Any guy who treats you less than a whole woman is not a whole man. Can’t make a keeper out of a kinkster.
Not at all an expert here, but could you approach it as an inappropriate situation comparing it to other sex acts and or an overwhelming amount of sex.
I’m not sure if it’d be better received as a babe I’m really grateful you’re so into me and my feet, but it’s getting overwhelming and making sex feel less special. Or something like babe I’m so glad you’re so into me, but it’s interfering with my ability to function. Think about how distracting it’d be if I came in and just started rubbing or sucking your dick as often as you do my feet… it’s not that I don’t appreciate the attention, but it’s becoming too much of day to day life versus special and intimate.
Well, you really hooked a wacko there.
Sorry to be so abrupt but seriously, the behaviour you describe is fruit loop city.
Simply on grounds of weirdness you should terminate this relationship with a recommendation that he seek psychiatric intervention.
This is a sexual thing, and sexual things need consent, and boundaries. If he were trying to have sex with you multiple times a day without care whether you’re into it or not, it’d be easier to see how problematic this is. You shouldn’t have to think, “Oh! I must let him have sex with me anytime because at least he’s showing me he wants me!” Obsession isn’t the compliment you think it is. It just means he’s not seeing you, but the one aspect of you that he wants to see. You need to not be afraid to have the conversation because if he shuts down because you start setting down boundaries then he was never interested in you at all, just easy access to feet.