I (22M) sometimes suggest stuff for my friend (21M) and I to do together, but he tends to dismiss a lot of my ideas because we don’t have a ‘friendship group’ to do it with.
I do have other friends who I spend time with now and then, and he’s also met them. But primarily it’s the two of us hanging out. And I admit that it would be fun for us to share a group of friends to go and do stuff together, but I still think the things I suggest would be fun for us two to do together. So it kinda hurts my feelings that he doesn’t think it would be worth doing if it was just the two of us.
I was about to send him a message basically saying how I feel about it. It’s not like I’m trying to have him ‘all to myself’, I’m not like that, I just want some of my ideas to actually count and not feel like I’m not enough for him to have fun with. How could I approach this?
TLDR: friend doesn’t want to go out and do a lot of things I suggest because he thinks it would only be fun to do in a ‘friendship group’, rather than just the two of us
2 comments
Personally, I would say something in the moment if he rejects your idea you can simply say “I think we can still do this just the two of us, but if that’s not something you’re interested in then that’s fine”
He sounds like a kind of selfish person who only wants to do what he wants to do and is using the group thing as an excuse. Maybe reconsider how much effort you put into this friendship going forward.
Your post history indicates you have feelings for your friend and you two have been sexually involved, so I think this is more complicated than you’re indicating here.