If I say anything to her either she says that i am always criticizing her or she interrupts me to keep talking about anything she has in mind about what we are arguing about instead of listening for once.
If i don’t take care of the mood of the conversation mostly it escalates.
She either say I’m sorry you are right, or she is passive aggressive or she is aggressive. Dialogue doesn’t happen that often when arguing so it is fucking impossible to feel heard.
What to do?
Also I feel extremely upset because every time i feel more trusting in the relationship and i feel a bit safer emotionally something happens that destroy that peace
Tl;dr:
I dont feel heard by gf since she interrupts me when we argue
2 comments
When you sense that the discussion is starting to escalate from a disagreement to an argument, leave. Ask for space so that you can both calm down. Then, sit down and have a conversation when you are both calm. Trying to communicate and get your point across when you’re both angry and upset doesn’t have much chance of success.
On another note:
> every time i feel more trusting in the relationship and i feel a bit safer emotionally something happens that destroy that peace
Sounds like there are deeper issues at play here. If there are trust issues in your relationship, they have to be dealt with decisively and effectively or it will inevitably fail.
If she’s 28, I’d personally cut my losses and find someone else. That’s the age someone should have matured enough to not fight like that.
If you want to try, I would tell her the way you two are communicating is not working for you. Have her read up on how to have good communication in a relationships and ask if she’s willing to change and work as a team.