How would you help a friend who has trouble connecting to new people

5 comments

1. He needs to build that up with experience. I can invite him to places, help him meet newer chill people and give him very tiny pointers but he needs to figure out the rest on his own.

2. I can’t help somebody at finding people they are compatible with to have a friendship

   If anything, if it’s a friend, I would go out with them, meet people together, and if I notice something that might be limiting them I will tell them, as a suggestion.

   That’s what some people did with me, they were really nice suggestions

3. He needs to understand what are the issues that drive that, how many of those are under his control and then look at what the desired state would be and work towards it. Your question is too generic to give a specific answer – he might have trouble because of his poor vocabulary or because he suffers from a mental health issue or anything in between….without knowing why it’s impossible to say what can be changed

4. structured activities that allow them to find common interests.

   do not push the romantic angle, the best romances come from well established friendships, in my opinion.

5. As someone who has had the same troubles as your friend, I would say that just introducing people goes a long way.

   * At a social gathering, I like when the person I know in that group introduces me – just a simple “Hey everybody, this is [friend] who I know from [place]. [Friend], this is [person], [person], and [person]. I try to do the same to connect people with my circle.
   * If it’s a more concerted effort to connect two people, you can explain why you’re going out of your way to introduce them (shared interest/career/whatever)
   * In online spaces, I’ve had friends start a group message on FB/Insta/whatever and basically say “Hey, I just wanted to connect you two since you [have a thing in common]/[might be able to help each other out]/[would make cute babies together]” and then remove themselves from the conversation group

   I don’t expect anybody to make my friends for me, but little things like that to break the ice are easy to do and are very helpful. The rest is up to me.