so to put it into context, my boyfriend and i have been together for almost 6 months, everything has been great, we argue sometimes but nothing too serious, and we sort it out almost straight away. ive never ever cheated on him or gone behind his back and done anything wrong. i don’t go out clubbing or partying. i have a pretty simple life, i go to work, play video games, hang out with my friends sometimes, go to the gym and that’s basically it. we get along very well but sometimes my emotions get in the way ( i was in an abusive relationship a year before him ) and although i have mostly healed from this, sometimes i get really emotional and i take things out on him even though it’s stuff that doesn’t really matter. I’ve worked on this and it’s gotten a lot better, but sometimes he says although he loves me deeply he doesn’t like it when i lash out. which is completely understandable but i have a hard time regulating my emotions sometimes. other than that we have a great relationship and everything is amazing.

anyway, when we first started dating, he asked me what my body count was. i lied and told him it was lower than what it is. dumb decision i know, but people always tend to overlook me because of that, ive been in multiple situations where i have almost gotten into a relationship and then i tell them what my body count is and they just ghost me. it was years ago when i had slept with a lot of people (i was young and dumb) and i am no longer in that mindset and i am sick of people just assuming the worst, so when he asked me, i lied because i was scared he would leave me and think if the worst, but all i wanted was a happy relationship and i wasn’t lying with mal intentions. 3 months later i confessed i was lying to him and told him the truth. he didn’t know how to take it at first but i think we sort of resolved it.

yesterday, he was hanging out with his friends and then i saw him afterwards. when i got in the car the first thing he said to me was i need to ask you something and please be honest. i had no idea what he was about to say. “tell me your real body count please i wont be mad i promise i just want to know.” і had already told him the truth so there was nothing more i could do so i said i already told you the truth and he said that his friends told him my body count was a ridiculously high number which is completely not true at all and he doesn’t believe anything i say no matter how hard i try to tell him im telling the truth he just doesn’t know what to believe and i have no idea what to do or what to say to him. we have an amazing relationship and i don’t want it be ruined over something so stupid. any advice V what i should do ??

TL;DR
so to sum it up i lied about my body count at first, months later i came clean and told him the truth. as of recently his friends have told him a complete lie and said my body count is ridiculously higher than it is. no matter how hard i try to tell him im telling the truth he doesn’t know what to believe. advice??

4 comments
  1. I have no idea why body count even matters. But if he’s not going to believe you when you tell him the truth, there isn’t anything you can do. He would rather judge you for a lie he was told than listen to you. That reflects very poorly on him, not you.

  2. You lied once, he probably thinks you will lie again. He doesn’t trust you and he has that right to not trust you after lying. May be time to end the relationship if you can’t earn his trust again.

  3. Some people care about body count, some don’t. There’s nothing wrong with that.

    Some people have a high body count, some don’t. There’s nothing wrong about that.

    Don’t lie about your body count, don’t shame anyone for their body count.

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