My partner (f) friendship with my best mate makes me a little bit uncomfortable.
For context, I have just recently moved in with my partner and have been together over a year and my best mate has been with his partner for almost 6 years now. We both seem very solid in our relationships and haven’t really had anything to worry about.
We were recently at a music festival and having taken MDMA on the dance floor(for those that know the come up with begin to feel very affectionate and want to tell everyone you love them).
My partner went around and told everyone how much she loves them and values being friends with them, as a somewhat newcomer to the group. In particular though, when she was talking to my best mate, it seemed really close and prompted a kiss on her forehead from him – where even as I saw, another friend of mine jokingly said “haha are you jealous”.
I can objectively say that I’m not the same with my friends partner, or any of my other female friends for that matter, however I’m not sure if it’s my anxious head taking over or if there is a bit of flirtatious nature happening. There was a moment a few months ago where I had feelings like this and made a comment “oh you and ___ seemed to be getting along well” where she told me that she just wanted to be good friends with him as he’s my best friend and that was important to me.
My partner and I often (somewhat jokingly) discuss about how well eventually get married and have kids and I feel there is so much truth in this. It just irks me a little bit and I’m not sure how to feel or think.
TL;DR
I’m not sure if I’m being anxious or if my partner and friend have a somewhat flirty relationship, it makes me a little bit uncomfortable and I don’t know how to bring this up.
2 comments
I think it was obnoxious of him to kiss her forehead, on the one hand, but on the other…y’all were doing a drug specifically known to make you touchy and lovey dovey and horny with people. If you don’t want to see that kind of behavior, stop doing mdma in clubs maybe?
Given it was just this one incident, and quite frankly could have been way worse given everyone was on a drug known to inspire touching and sexual behavior, let it go. If there’s a pattern of your friend being handsy with her you can talk to them both and say you would appreciate if they knocked it off…but I just don’t see that as the case as of now
Christ, if my partner’s best mate kissed me on the forehead or even touched me, I would’ve thrown a hissy fit, lol. It does seem a little weird. I am friends with my partner’s best mate, but not good friends or anywhere near like this.
I understand you guys were under the influence of drugs, and I heard it does make some people touchy-feely or far too emotionally open, so remember that. For me, being a weirdo, it makes me into a robot or an encyclopedia, my partner says. I won’t shut up either.
How long has your girlfriend made you feel uncomfortable with your best friend? Is there other times rather than this and not being under the influence of any drugs?