im 21F and my boyfriend is 23M
over and over, ive been told to treat him kinder, do this and that, and i swear i feel like ive been trying. but it feels like time goes by so fast that i “dont get a chance to change anything” when i really have all the time in the world. and i know thats not an excuse. i should be able to change and put in effort for my partner but i cant even retain basic memories from a few days ago… he says, one day im going to be a little too mean, or he’ll get tired of asking me to change over and over. and he wont be there for me. and it felt like a knife stabbing me in the heart. i feel like such a manipulator for even asking for an opinion on this. why is he even still with me. he’s such a gentle and kind soul, and really i dont understand why he stays around for me even he says i just need to go to therapy. all i want is to spend thw rest of my life with him but its been really bad lately please am i okay? are we going to be okay?
1 comment
He brought up an issue repeatedly and you are not changing. At some point he will leave if you don’t. This is exactly how people check out of relationships before it’s even over. If you care about him you listen to his concerns and you improve. I brought something like that up to my boyfriend once, he was making a few too many kind of mean jokes and barely any validation so i didn’t feel fully wanted. A feeling like that is painful. But he listened to my concern and immediately changed. Because it was important to him to make me feel loved. You just don’t. And honestly that’s pretty terrible.