So me and my girlfriend have been dating for about 6 months and recently she has started to get angry with me for liking girls photos on Instagram but she posts bikini photos and has hundreds of boys liking her posts. I don’t have a problem with her posting her body because I know she’s only for me and I don’t care about the other lads liking her post but I’m not allowed to like my friends posts who are girls and she even has a problem with my liking my friends girlfriends posts same goes for sending kisses to people. This sounds proper childish but I was wondering what other people think of this situation? Should I stop liking girls photos or is she controlling ?
48 comments
Not quite a USSR grade red flag, but getting there. She’s both possessive and a hypocrite. I don’t want to be overdramatic, but if those behaviours start to snowball later on in the relationship it won’t end well. Barring some immensely compelling reason not to, ditch her and find someone thats less of an AH.
You are both wrong. She’s seeking male attention and validation; you are out there looking and giving it to others.
Both your priorities aren’t the relationship.
This relationship won’t last.
The idea of you two is false, she posts her body for others to see which is getting attention, same with you, you like your friends posts which make them think you’re available, best way is to talk to each other, you both still young and you can work something out, best of luck to you both.
Stop being a doormat and being “cool” with your girl showing tits and ass to everyone on the internet while you are not allowed to do something lol.
Power move: Just post some bikini pics of your own
You, my friend, have a girlfriend who.’s a hypocrite and narcissist….I wish you the best of luck because you’ll need it.
Double standards entered the room. Imo (30m), it kinda sucks she posts thirst traps online. And it kinda sucks that you like thirst traps online. Do with this info as you please.
You both need to part ways and grow up before either of you even consider another relationship.
Do you understand how easily avoidable both things are? if you can’t do these easy things for each others then what does it say to you?
tbh i think she is a being a little controlling. She might be insecure if she is that stressed about you double tapping another girl (esp a friend’s or friend’s gf) photo. The kissy face might be a little far tho idk what thats about
You should be able to like girls posts and she should be able to post her own pics. I would draw the line at posting kiss emojis under girls photos though…that just seems unnecessary
My husband and I had a similar issue at the beginning of our relationship. Photos I would post would get hundreds of likes and some thirst, even fully clothed. He said “gas is free” when I asked him why he would react to every hot girls’ photos, he gasses them up they gas him up. These were people we know and had to see in public.
I expressed that it bothered me, we both came to the decision our relationship was more important than validation from others. We cleaned up our friends’ lists and followings and it hasn’t been an issue since.
I only post appropriate photos, or I run it by my husband first (my own idea, not his) and he doesn’t lust after sw’ers or random women bc he assured me he doesn’t care about anyone but me!
This was our solution, not a one size fits all answer. If the relationship is worth it to both of you open communication is going to be the absolute first step
Definitely very weird that you can’t like other girl’s posts (I’m assuming you didn’t mean sexual pics of other girls). She shouldn’t be controlling that while also posting revealing pics of herself. However, the kissy face emoji is strange… why are they necessary if not to flirt?
Go get a bright red Speedo and start posting your own photos 😆, if my wife were to start posting pictures of her half naked body I would do the same. She is an assistant principal, so I sincerely doubt she’ll start that now 🤣😂🤣
Double standards… she’s an attention seeking bellchief.
You should both be very concerned about the draft rn
I expressed my dislike for my bf liking girls pics on Instagram many times. Didn’t stop. Went down the petty revenge road and posted a bikini pic myself. Problem solved. Not that I know your dynamic but seems like she keeps complaining and you keep on doing it. Maybe you both should just stop seeking and giving validation to other people online instead of communicating properly (not that I’m on I high horse about this, I literally solved the problem by fighting fire with fire)
I like to have the rule of “if someone else posted this exact thing and you would get upset if i liked it, then you probably shouldn’t post it either”, seems to have worked so far, social media in relationships always be making extra complications anyways.
Ok what’s her IG user name?
Personally I can see where she’s coming dependent on a few things. Most women will post a bikini pic or two because they are feeling confident. That is the intent behind it. When a guy likes a woman’s bikini pic it usually gives off the vibe that the guy finds that pic hot (sociology major here, just how society works unfortunately). However if you’re liking fully clothed pics of your female friends I see no issue. Do not be sending kissy faces to people either; that too crosses a line
And my boyfriend liked pics but raged if I posted, turns out he was the one cheating fr 💀
watch out for possessive hypocrites. Some double standards have no limits
Both are disrespectful to your partner imo
Classic case of rules for ye but not for thee.. and she’s also gaslighting and projecting. She doesn’t want you to talk to other girls or like their pictures because she views them as competition. She knows you’re a high value guy.
Because we all know damn well she’s likely flirting with those guys online too. I would put money on it…if you created an alternate Instagram account under an alias, and flirted with her she would totally flirt right back.
She posts pictures because she likes the attention and validation she’s receiving from other men. That my friend… is cheating. Your best bet is to cut this one loose. She can’t be trusted! Even if she says she’ll delete the account do not fall for it… She will be back to her old tricks in no time, because that attention and validation is addicting.
Now act like a high value man and drop her like a rock.
Sometimes fate leads you to meet people whose sole reason is to teach you a lesson. You’re young, I suspect that this girl is going to teach you a lesson about relationships and red flags that you will keep with you for the rest of your life.
It’s cringe for her to post bikini pics and it’s also cringe for you to like other girl’s bikini pics.
Why does she feel the need to post photos like that? Have you asked? Is she seeking some sort of attention that she isn’t receiving? Is this new or has she done it even before you got together? Is she an “influencer” or trying to be? What’s her motivation? Really try to get down to the bottom of it so you can help her and explain your feelings.
Now for you… Why do you feel the need to view that content and like it when you have a girlfriend that’s willing to provide you with the same photos? Liking your friend’s photos is absolutely fine in my opinion, but liking random thirst traps is where I would draw the line. I’d be embarrassed as all hell if my friends saw that my boyfriend liked a Belle Delphine post or something lol.
I would be personally upset if my partner did either one of these things. She’s definitely being hypocritical and you both have valid feelings. Sounds like a good conversation free of arguing or emotional upset is a good way to get to the bottom of why you both feel the need to do these things.
If you’re in a relationship, don’t like chicks posts. If she’s in a relationship, she can’t post said pics, this isn’t hard.
I can’t believe the comments on this post! A woman is allowed to post bikini pix, maybe she just loves her body and is confident? It’s not her fault she’s hot and young! Literally every girl posts bikini pics lol it’s not always just for male attention
I do think her getting mad about you liking another girls pix is unfair unless you are exclusively liking other girls bikini pix or thirst traps
Her being confident and posting doesn’t necessarily mean she’s looking for male attention. If you’re only liking ‘normal’ posts of other girls who are ur friends then she shouldn’t care, I’d only be annoyed if you were liking the thirst traps cos that’s sending a message to that person. She’s just posting these on her own page it’s not as if she’s sending them to anyone in particular.
I think talk about it and set ur own boundaries tho, it’s all up to the individual what they are comfortable with
I avoid all that drama by not using Instagram.
My advice is to avoid commenting on the appearance or attractiveness of females other than your wife/girlfriend.
In person you can make the occasional compliment to a mutual friend but make sure you are also complimenting your lady. Doing it online suggests you are cruising for chicks.
Yeah no shit it’s going to be weird if you’re posting 😘😘😘 under other girl’s bikini pictures. That’s a very basic thing you should know not to do in a relationship. I think you should be able to like people’s pictures but the fact that you’re commenting kisses makes the entire thing weird and makes me question whether you’re just “liking your friend’s picture” or checking them out in an overtly sexual way
I mean you are ridiculous, its not that hard to not like other girls photos when your in a relationship. The sending kisses is weird though, not gonna lie. What self respecting man sends another women kisses when they’re in a relationship. However it does make me laugh seeing all these people in the comments try to justify why its okay for women to post bikini pictures or thirst traps pictures, but its not okay for men to like them. “Why shouldn’t she post bikini pictures if she’s confident” “Why shouldn’t she get attention from other men while being in a relationship with other men, its laughable honestly
She’s posting in a bikini because she likes her body and feel comfortable posting it, and especially if she doesn’t have a following she won’t really get that male attention. The difference is, you’re doing it to lust. I’m not even sure why you have female friends in a relationship because I feel that guys are only friends with girls they want to sleep with. But regardless, if it’s just a regular picture of these girls I could maybe see it being okay. If you’re liking thirst traps and bikini pics especially of women you don’t even know that is disrespectful. And sending kisses to people? I would’ve dumped you you’re literally flirting lmfaooo
Well, the first thing is to stop liking pictures (what do you gain from this??). This way you have at least some footing when you tell her to stop posting bikini pics. You probably don’t like that she advertises her body to other men. So if you want her to stop, tell her, If she doesn’t want to stop, then take note that she chose attention from other men over you and move on
She should stop posting bikini pics, and you should stop liking other girls pics. Orrrrrr you can break up and find someone more compatible 🍾🍾🍾🍾🥇
Ugh don’t you love today’s generation? I’m only 28 but can tell you i didn’t marry a woman who would ever be into doing that anyway and i don’t have an instagram. I can say, this probably isn’t going to be the woman you marry, and I’ll also say she shouldn’t marry you either. Not trying to be rude, seriously just telling it like it is. This is a generational problem. Put the phone down and stop liking girls pictures, go out there and find a respectable woman. You’re going to have to work on both of yourselves before you find serious love. This is child’s play and unfortunately you’re playing into the norm of today’s society.
Well this sounds like a typical childish relationship in the year of our Lord 2023. You should both stop it. She has no reason to post bikini pics unless she’s a model and it’s her career. You should be able to like normal posts from girls but I see no reason to like suggestive posts from other women. All of this just muddies the waters. If you’re in a committed relationship you need to establish healthy boundaries and expectations that aren’t controlling but are respectful..I don’t see that happening here, and maybe that’s just a sign that this relationship will run its course sooner than later. And that’s okay, too.
She’s controlling.
I always try to operate under “Fair is Fair”. So if my girlfriend didn’t like me doing something and asked me to stop, I would ask the same thing of her even if it didn’t really bother me. Because fair is fair.
So if you don’t like me liking those kinds of pictures, then you can’t post those kinds of pictures.
Well, that means that she is totally aware of the reasons she gets so many likes on IG, simply because those.men are horny and see her in a lascivious way, and she assumes the same from you. The question is: Why does she post those bikini pictures all the time then? What is she trying to achieve when she knows why she is being given those likes?
Use those questions against her and see how she tries to justify her pictures while coming up with some bullshit to say your likes are for a different reason.
i’ve been in relationships and wanted to post cute pics or beach pics of myself because i feel good and pretty and want the world to know i look pretty. people can say that’s not what it is, but it’s the truth. that’s what 80% of people’s social medias are for- wanting people to think you look/live well. the difference is when she posts those pics, it’s simply because she’s a human and uses social media like most every other young girl does- posting pics where they look good without doing it for other guys or because she “likes” other guys(i used to post pics like that and i literally was into women, i had no interest in guys) and when you like girl’s pictures, you’re not doing it for yourself, you’re doing it for them, and showing that you at least like what they’re putting out and that’s when it’s weird. my thoughts though
I really don’t think it’s that big of a deal. If you were constantly liking photos of half-naked girls, following pornstars etc, in that case I would understand why she’s mad. But if it’s just regular pictures of your female friends it’s not something bad at all. It sounds like she’s either too insecure or too controlling, so you should have a proper talk with her
She’s wrong for posting thirst traps while in a relationship
You’re wrong for liking thirst traps while in a relationship.
You both should grow the f up
why you liking other girls pics when you gotta bad btch right there smh
I, Male, don’t think either of you are necessarily in the wrong. Posting pictures of yourself and liking photos of your friends are both normal behavior. Instead of trying to figure out who is objectively right and wrong from other people, you should talk to your partner about it.
A relationship is like a contract that you two will work together to live harmoniously. Like, I never used to open doors and pull out seats for my previous partners. My last partner thought it was kind of weird and too old school. But now I do for my current partner because she likes it, and I enjoy making her happy. I’m not concerned, like “but she isn’t opening doors for me, so it’s not fair.” She makes small concessions to make me happy in other ways. Whether or not I should open my door for my partner is not an objective answer, it depends on making them happy.
What matters is that you two can find an agreement that leaves both of you happy in the relationship. It’s important that you are true to yourself and don’t agree to something you know would leave you feeling bitter. But be willing to hear why she doesn’t like you liking other posts. Maybe there is a compromise in what you like and comment on. And I personally don’t think what your partner does on social media should matter much at all, but if you can’t find an agreement that makes you both happy, break up.
Why not spend less time liking and posting content on social media for engagement and start engaging in a real relationship with each other by doing real stuff. Maybe she is crying out for attention for you to get off your butt and take her outdoors to do something to escape this boring life.
This is a double standard. If she is going to post pictures of herself for others to see, like and comment on than she has made a statement that is ok. It should be ok for you as well. However, if she determines that your relationship is exclusive enough to warrant her discontinuing her online pictures than it might be fair to ask you to not be searching for online pictures of other girls.
In my day we had different stages of relationships. Are you just dating? Are you “going together?” Are you serious, like possibly considering being married someday? The rules for dating other people, looking at and talking to others intimately were different depending on what kind of relationship you have. The rules today for various types of relationships seems to be less clear.
Welp. Time for YOU to start posting bikini pictures
I really think we would need to see these bikini photos to make a fair assessment… You know…purely for the sake of being fair and objective 🤣🤣🤣
Every time she posts a shot, recreate it and post it on yours. Fight fire with fire 🔥